Sand Through The Hourglass
by HourGlassGirl
Summary: Samantha and Ej were headed for happily ever after when his secrets come to light. Days pass but will they find their way back to each other? Or will they really be over?
1. Prologue

Prologue

Sami and Ej were like any other couple in the beginning, spending every moment possible together. Talking and showing that a love like theirs was real, they were meant to be and nothing was going to tear them apart. Sami had just ran out on her marriage to Austin and for the first time felt free. She ran right to Ej who picked up all the right pieces and made her feel whole again, over the next six months everything seemed to fall into place. The love that was always there began to surface and Ej proposed, wanting nothing more then to marry the blonde bombshell that could always bring him to his knees.

However, he was still holding something back, the secret that he knew could destroy them forever. Sami didn't know who he was or what he was from and Ej could never find the time to tell her. He was a Dimera, Stephano's son and the heir to the entire Dimera Empire. The crowned prince of the darkness his family was.

Ej made the mistake of thinking he could keep it from her, keep those two parts of his life separate but his father had something else in mind. On their wedding day, as the two stood at the front of the church, prepared to take their vows, Stephano came bursting through the doors and ruined all the dreams Ej had for himself. As Stephano greeted his son, Sami had tears running down her face as she threw her ring at Ej and went running out of the church. Not stopping until she reached her car and dropped her veil in the street as she pulled away. Of course Ej went out after her, but she was gone and he was regretting teaching her to drive like that.


	2. Walk Away  Michael Bolton

"Walk Away" – Michael Bolton

Chapter 1 

A year has now passed and the two are still apart, Sami not willing to forgive him for the lies he told and Ej still trying his best to win her heart. He would corner her in the hall just to get a chance to speak to her, left her messages begging her to answer and even sending her roses weekly just to show he cared. Neither had been able to go out since the wedding that never was, just couldn't bare to be with anyone else. But none of it mattered, she didn't trust him and he was running out of ideas.

IT'S OVER NOW, GOTTA FACE IT ONE LAST TIME 

**WE'LL NEVER MAKE IT WORK, HEAVEN KNOWS WE TRIED**

LIVING THIS LIFE, HOLDIN' ON FOR SO LONG 

**I KNOW IT WON'T BE EASY, BUT IT'S TIME TO BE STRONG**

"Just leave me alone! If you ever loved me, you'll walk away!" She yelled in anger, the night before as she met him in the hallway, and then went into her apartment, leaving him headed back to his head down and looking for a drink. He slid down his door and stared around the room, trying to figure out where he went from there, the next morning he was still there. Sitting on the floor waiting for an answer, it would have been their one-year wedding anniversary and yet he had no ring on his finger.

"Happy Anniversary." He said and knew it was time for him to move on.

**WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY**

**DON'T YOU WAIT A MINUTE LONGER**

WALK AWAY FROM THE LOVE WE KNOW IS WRONG 

**WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY**

**DO IT NOW WHILE I CAN FIND THE STRENGH TO SAY**

**LEAVE ME NOW, BEFORE MY HEART WON'T LET YOU**

**WALK AWAY**

After a year of begging, after a year of pleading for a second chance he decided to give her what she asked for. He was going to leave, and he needed to do it today. For the first time all day, he got up and headed to his room. Knowing he needed to pack up at least a suitcase and write a letter to his Samantha, telling her goodbye and that she should move on. He knew even if he got the chance to talk to her face to face that he wouldn't be able to do it, after that he decided to call the movers the following day and headed out of his apartment, slipping the note under her door and then heading to the elevators. He stopped as they opened and looked back at her door, remembering all that they were and he always hoped they could be again.

**YOU AND I, NEVER WANTED IT TO END**

**JUST HAVE TO FIND A WAY, TO START LIVIN' AGAIN**

**OH, LOVE OF MY LIFE, I DON'T WANT TO LET YOU GO**

**LEAVE BEHIND THE MEMORIES, A FOREVER THAT WE'LL NEVER KNOW**

"Goodbye my love, there will never be another." He said and disappeared from sight, heading for the life that lay ahead of him. Italy to run the Dimera Empire as his father seen fit, praying that it would distract him from the memory that would haunt him for the rest of his life, the wedding day that caused Sami so much pain.

**YA KNOW WE CAN'T GO ON, YA KNOW THE REASON WHY**

**THAT DON'T MAKE IT ANY EASIER, WHEN IT COMES TO SAYING**

**GOOD-BYE**

**WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY**

**DO IT NOW WHILE I CAN FIND THE STRENGTH TO SAY**

**LEAVE ME NOW**

BEFORE MY HEART WON'T LET YOU GO 

As much as Ej's heart was breaking as he walked out of the apartment building, he knew it was for the best. Walking away from Sami was what he had to do. She needed space and he was just making things worse by staying. He just hoped that he wasn't sealing his fate in the process.


	3. My Wish  Rascal Flatts

"My Wish" – Rascal Flatts

Chapter 2 

Samantha was prepared to spend another day and night sitting in her apartment alone. She knew the roses that were delivered early that night were from Ej. Only Ej sent her roses once a week, always with the same card.

"I still love you. -Ej" Never was it the delivery guys handwriting, but his as if he signed a hundred and just left them waiting to be delivered every Sunday. However, she didn't expect the letter that seemed to slip under her door unnoticed. She figured it was from Ej, but something about this one was different then all the others, something that scared her to open it. Something seemed final about it.

**I HOPE THE DAYS COME EASY AND THE MOMENTS PASS SLOW,**

**AND EACH ROAD LEADS YOU WHERE YOU WANNA GO,**

**AND IF YOU'RE FACED WITH A CHOICE AND YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE,**

**I HOPE YOU CHOOSE THE ONE THAT MEANS THE MOST TO YOU.**

_Samantha – _

_If you haven't realized by now that I love you then I will tell you again. Nothing could ever break the love I have for you; nothing could ever take you out of my heart. Only you have the power over my heart, you always have and you always will. I never loved you for the way you looked, even though I thought you were gorgeous, but I loved you for so much more. I love you for how you make me laugh when the world seemed to be so cruel. _

**AND IF ONE DOOR OPENS TO ANOTHER DOOR CLOSED,**

**I HOPE YOU KEEP ON WALKIN' TIL YOU FIND THE WINDOW,**

**IF IT'S COLD OUTSIDE, SHOW THE WORLD THE WARMTH OF YOUR SMILE.**

**BUT MORE THAN ANYTHING, MORE THAN ANYTHING…**

_You were always the one that would do anything for love and I just hope one day you will feel that way again even if its not with me anymore. I always told you how strong you were and that you could do anything, don't forget that. Never let anyone tell you that you cant, you can and I know that, just believe in yourself. I know your life never was what you thought it would be, but it was what I always knew you could handle. _

**MY WISH, FOR YOU, IS THAT THIS LIFE BECOMES ALL THAT YOU WANT IT TO,**

**YOUR DREAMS STAY BIG, YOUR WORRIES STAY SMALL,**

**YOU NEVER NEED TO CARRY MORE THAN YOU CAN HOLD,**

**AND WHILE YOU'RE OUT THERE GETTING WHERE YOU'RE GETTING TO,**

**I HOPE YOU KNOW SOMEBODY LOVES YOU, AND WANTS THE SAME THINGS TOO,**

**YEAH, THIS, IS MY WISH**

_Samantha, don't worry about me, I know that a part of you loves me, that is just who you are and I wouldn't have it any other way. I want you to let me go like I know you have been trying to do, I want you to start over and find someone that deserves the wonderful person that you are, the person I so foolishly lost._

**I HOPE YOU NEVER LOOK BACK, BUT YOU NEVER FORGET,**

**ALL THE ONES WHO LOVE YOU, IN THE PLACE YOU LEFT,**

**I HOPE YOU ALWAYS FORGIVE, AND YOU NEVER REGRET,**

_I know I should have told you the truth, about who I was and why I originally came to Salem. Something just kept me from doing that, I was scared for you, I was afraid I would lose you and you would leave me and as much as I loved you, I couldn't risk that. If anyone understands that you should._

**AND YOU HELP SOMEBODY EVERY CHANCE YOU GET,**

**OH, YOU FIND GOD'S GRACE, IN EVERY MISTAKE,**

**AND ALWAYS GIVE MORE THAN YOU TAKE.**

**BUT MORE THAN ANYTHING, YEAH, MORE THAN ANYTHING…**

_I just need you to know that I would have given it all up for you, all you had to do was ask and it was gone. I would walk away from my family if you would tell me it would get you back. You were the destiny I never knew and once I did I wasn't willing to let anything take that away from me, I couldn't lose you. _

_I know that losing you was my fault and saying I'm sorry for all the lies will never make up for that, make up for the part of me that was always hidden from you. The look in your eyes that day have haunted me for months now and nothing I can do will seem to erase the pain I put in your eyes. The pain I caused you over something as simple as a lie. You wanted the perfect wedding, like you always did and I took that from you, I took that away from you and for that I will never forgive myself._

**MY WISH, FOR YOU, IS THAT THIS LIFE BECOMES ALL THAT YOU WANT IT TO,**

**YOUR DREAMS STAY BIG, YOUR WORRIES STAY SMALL,**

**YOU NEVER NEED TO CARRY MORE THAN YOU CAN HOLD,**

**AND WHILE YOU'RE OUT THERE GETTING WHERE YOU'RE GETTING TO,**

**I HOPE YOU KNOW SOMEBODY LOVE YOU, AND WANTS THE SAME THINGS TOO,**

**YEAH, THIS, IS MY WISH**

_Samantha darling, I will always love you and I hope that walking away from you will show you that. Show you that despite everything, all the pushing me away, all the times you told me to get lost. I never wanted to leave, but in the end I knew it was for the best because it was what you needed. I never really understood why, but I do now, if you love someone you have to let them be. Letting you go will hopefully help you find what you are looking for, the happiness I could give but never let you have. Maybe one day we'll find our way back, but if not, I will wish you luck in life and know I will always be there for you, always._

_-Always Yours, Ej_

**MY WISH, FOR YOU, IS THAT THIS LIFE BECOMES ALL THAT YOU WANT IT TO,**

**YOUR DREAMS STAY BIG, YOUR WORRIES STAY SMALL,**

**YOU NEVER NEED TO CARRY MORE THAN YOU CAN HOLD,**

**AND WHILE YOU'RE OUT THERE GETTING WHERE YOU'RE GETTING TO,**

**I HOPE YOU KNOW SOMEBODY LOVE YOU, AND WANTS THE SAME THINGS TOO,**

**YEAH, THIS, IS MY WISH**

As Sami put down the letter she fell to pieces on her couch. She couldn't believe he would ever really leave, she knew she kept telling him to but something told her he wouldn't. As she sat in pieces, she just wanted it all to go away, all the pain and regret of the past year. Knowing why he did it, why he lied made everything seem to come into focus and she knew what she had to do, what she needed to do if she was ever going to be happy again. She needed to fight for him, to bring him back to her.


	4. Who Knew  Pink

"Who Knew" – Pink

Chapter 3 

Sami ran to her car, still crying and still clutching the letter in her hand. Hoping that she was right and he was headed to the airport. She tried to call him a million times on the way, but she couldn't seem to focus. She could only see his face, smiling at her and telling her that everything was ok.

YOU TOOK MY HAND 

**YOU SHOWED ME HOW**

**YOU PROMISED ME YOU'D BE AROUND**

**UH HUH**

**THAT'S RIGHT**

"Samantha, come on we have to get going if we're ever going to make it too the rehearsal dinner on time. Stop worrying about your hair, you look incredible."

"Everything has to be perfect, I always have bad things happen and tonight I just don't want that, I want this to work."

"Darling look at me, I love you more that anything and you have been completely honest with me, so why do you fear this? Nothing could ever make me leave you!" He told her and that was what she was remembering now, him telling her that everything would be fine and that he would never leave her.

**I TOOK YOUR WORDS **

**AND I BELIEVED**

**IN EVERYTHING**

**YOU SAID TO ME**

**YEAH HUH**

**THAT'S RIGHT**

Sami pulled in front of the airport and jumped out, leaving her car running and the keys in the ignition. As she ran through the terminal, all she could hear were their memories in her mind. Everything he told her, all the time she said he loved her and would never leave, but now she was afraid, for the first time afraid he would.

"Sami, be happy you left him at the alter, at least you found out before it was too late. Before there was no way to get out of the marriage." Marlena told her when she was found at the _Cheatin' Heart_ doing shots, still in her wedding gown.

"I loved him, I loved him more than anything. He was my world and now I ran away from that. I not only loved him but I trusted him, I thought he was honest with me and trusted me. I never thought he would ever let me down." She said and did another shot.

**IF SOMEONE SAID THREE YEARS FROM NOW**

**YOU'D BE LONG GONE**

**I'D STAND UP AND PUNCH THEM OUT**

**CAUST THEY'RE ALL WRONG**

**I KNOW BETTER**

**CAUSE YOU SAID FOREVER**

**AND EVER**

**WHO KNEW**

Sami made it to the board and just search it, trying to figure out where he would go, then she seen the next flight ITALY and knew that's where he was headed. He said his father wanted him to go there in one of their last conversations. However, she could only remember when they were planning their honeymoon and bought their tickets for the same place, wanting to sight see and spend time in the most beautiful place in the world, Venice.

"We were fools, really thinking that we would make it." She thought to herself, knowing the plane would be leaving any minute and she probably wouldn't be right anyway. She ran anyway, ignoring the burning in her lungs as she flew through the airport, hoping against hope she would find him.

**REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE SUCH FOOLS**

**AND SO CONVICNED AND JUST TOO COOL**

**OH NO**

**NO NO**

**I WISH I COULD TOUCH YOU AGAIN**

**I WISH I COULD STILL CALL YOU FRIEND**

**I'D GIVE ANYTHING**

"Please just let me find him, please God, give me this." She prayed, running and bumping into people without ever stopping to say she was sorry or try to get them back to their feet. She didn't have time; she needed to get out of there, to get to him before he left forever.

**WHEN SOMEONE SAID COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS NOW**

'**FORE THEY'RE LONG GONE**

**I GUESS I JUST DIDN'T KNOW HOW**

**I WAS ALL WRONG**

**THEY KNEW BETTER**

**STILL YOU SAID FOREVER**

**AND EVER**

**WHO KNEW**

"Sami, you're mom's right. You don't want to be mixed up with the Dimera family, it only leads to trouble and you know that. He lied to you, he made a fool of you and how could you even think of going back?" Belle said, watching her sister drown in sorrows a week after the wedding.

"Everyone told you that Shawn was a long shot, that he would never come back to you and that you should honor what you had with Phillip. But you couldn't you couldn't stay away from Shawn because you loved him. I love Ej, even after everything I love him. I can't turn that off and everyone just needs to give me the time to work it out." She said and went back to her bedroom where she put on _Casablanca_ for the 100th time, the only thing besides Ej that could ever make her feel better.

**YEAH YEAH**

**I'LL KEEP YOU LOCKED IN MY HEAD**

**UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN**

**UNTIL WE**

**UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN**

**AND I WON'T FORGET YOU MY FRIEND**

**WHAT HAPPENED**

Even though Sami knew that she shouldn't be here, that she shouldn't be trying to find him and bring him back, she couldn't help herself. She loved him and if nothing else, he would always be a memory. She could erase his presence from her apartment, or even more, but she could never get him out of her mind or her heart and his letter showed her that. With that simple letter she seen the man that she fell in love with, the man that would walk through fire for her and with that she knew that she needed to give him another chance, just make sure he understood there were no more lies and that she would never be associated with that family besides the name that some would use when speaking to him.

IF SOMEONE SAID THREE YEARS FROM NOW 

**YOU'D BE LONG GONE**

**I'D STAND UP AND PUNCH THEM OUT**

**CAUSE THEY'RE ALL WRONG AND**

**THAT LAST KISS**

**I'LL CHERISH**

**UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN**

**AND TIME MAKES **

**IT HARDER **

"Ej, get out of here, you're not suppose to see me before the wedding, come on it's always midnight."

"I know, but I also remember how you wake up and want to make sure there is no one here to kiss my fiancé but me." He said and laughed.

"You have to wait until we are man and wife, then and only thin do you get to kiss me!" She said and went to close the door but instead he pulled her into a kiss and dipped her low as she ran her hands through his hair, instinctively wanting to go to bed to make love like they had so many times before. However, the clock struck midnight and she knew her Cinderella fairy tale needed to end.

"Come on, just let me stay with you." He said, but she closed the door and just laughed as she locked it.

"At the church, you will see me at the church." She said and laughed as she leaned against the door, never knowing what would be of her wedding day.

**I WISH I COULD REMEMBER**

**BUT I KEEP**

**YOUR MEMORY**

**YOU VISIT ME IN MY SLEEP**

**MY DARLING**

**WHO KNEW**

Sami got to the gate and seen that the plane was getting ready to pull away and instantly went to the window, hoping against hope that he would see her. Somehow he would see her presence in the window and stop the plane, get off and come back to her but as it pulled away she started to realize that would never happen. She would forever be apart from him, it was too late and she had no one to blame but herself.

**MY DARLING**

MY DARLING 

**WHO KNEW**

**MY DARLING**

**I MISS YOU**


	5. The Way We Were  Barbara Streisand

"The Way We Were" – Barbara Streisand

Chapter 4

As Ej headed to the airport, visions of Sami still fresh in his mind, he looked out at the airstrip and knew he was doing the right thing. Everything he ever wanted was back in Salem but now she no longer wanted him and all he did was cause her misery.

"I'll miss you, but I know now this is truly for the best." He said and boarded the plane, just hoping that he was really doing the right thing. As he looked out at the city, the only place that ever felt like home, he couldn't help but have a flood of memories between him and Sami.

**MEMORIES,**

**LIKE THE CORNERS OF MY MIND**

**MISTY WATER-COLORED MEMORIES**

**OF THE WAY WE WERE**

When Sami and Ej met, there was an instant attraction, not just because she seen him in all his glory when he dropped his towel, but when the door opened and she heard his accent. Sami always told him that he had her at hello. For some reason she could never get enough of talking to him, his soothing words that could always put her racing mind to rest.

**SCATTERED PICTURES,**

**OF THE SMILES WE LEFT BEHIND**

**SMILES WE GAVE TO ONE ANOTHER**

**FOR THE WAY WE WERE**

As he smiled, remembering what he once was to her, her best friend and the man she said loved her like no other, he couldn't help but pull out her picture one last time. Inside his wallet, always tucked behind his credit cards was her face, shining blue eyes and hair of gold. The women that he knew would always be able to control him, and make him someone to be respected not feared.

**CAN IT BE THAT IT WAS ALL SO SIMPLE THEN?**

**OR HAS TIME RE-WRITTEN EVERY LINE?**

**IF WE HAD THE CHANCE TO DO IT ALL AGAIN**

**TELL ME, WOULD WE? COULD WE?**

Sami and Ej tangoed on the pier just a little over a year before tonight, moving their bodies with one another not mentioning where. There was always an unspoken understanding that they had, one that couldn't be duplicated or understood by anyone but them. That was part of the reason he loved her so much, talking wasn't always necessary and for a man with secrets, this was a blessing.

"Ej, I can't believe we won that contest. I mean I have never done this before."

"Tango isn't about the moves Samantha. It's about the people and the passion they have when they move." He could still remember everything about that night, the way her hair smelled like perfume, her eyes had that sparkle that only moonlight could bring out. Even her returning home with Austin where he could hear them in bed together and just wish that it would one day be him.

**MEMORIES, MAY BE BEAUTIFUL AND YET**

**WHAT'S TOO PAINFUL TO REMEMBER**

**WE SIMPLY CHOOSE TO FORGET**

Not one memory about the wedding, or a fight ever came to his mind then. He wanted to leave the same way he came, happy. Or right now, as happy as he knew he could ever be. Yes leaving Sami behind was the hardest thing he would ever do, but if it made her happy he would do it. Walking through fire was nothing knew for him, falling for Sami was just that, playing with fire.

**SO IT'S THE LAUGHTER**

**WE WILL REMEMBER**

**WHEN WE REMEMBER…**

"Samantha, where are you going?" he called from the bedroom, seeing her headed to the kitchen still wearing his shirt.

"I figured you could use a drink, I know that I can." She said and laughed as she opened the fridge, only to have him grabbing her from behind as she bent over.

"Well ya, but I'd rather have you instead." He said and before they could even close the fridge, he had her up in his arms and carrying her back to the bedroom. That was probably one of his favorite memories, locking themselves in her apartment, the morning after he proposed at Chez Rouge, got down on his knee and asked her to take him in mind, body and soul. Be his for all the days of their lives, not even death couldn't separate them because they would just unite on the other side.

As the plane got ready to take off, Ej knew that it was too late to turn back now. As the runway lights went full blast he could only see the sky ahead, the moonshining and a tower he would soon be passing. He never even looked over at the airport terminal, or the window Samantha was beating on, just hoping for him to turn around and see her, come back to her.

**THE WAY WE WERE**

**THE WAY WE WERE**


	6. Apologize  One Republic

"Apologize" – One Republic

Chapter 5 

**I'M HOLDING ON YOUR ROPE,**

**GOT ME TEN FEET OFF THE GROUND**

**I'M HEARIN' WHAT YOU SAY BUT I JUST CAN'T MAKE A SOUND**

YOU TELL ME THAT YOU NEED ME 

Sami stayed at the airport for over an hour crying at the window, she couldn't bare to get up and leave because that meant admitting that she lost him. That he left and she had no way to get him back, they were really over and she didn't quite know how to handle that. The stewardess recognized her and called for her sister Belle to come get her, knowing she would never make it home on her own.

"Sami, what are you doing here?" Belle said as she walked over to her sister and sat down next to her.

"What are you doing here?"

"The lady at the counter I knew in school and she called me because she was worried about you. She said you've been her for over an hour. What happened?"

"He left, I kept pushing and he left."

**THEN YOU GO AND CUT ME DOWN, BUT WAIT**

**YOU TELL ME THAT YOU'RE SORRY**

**DIDN'T THINK I'D TURN AROUND, AND SAY…**

"What are you talking about?" Belle asked, not realizing at first that she meant Ej.

"Ej, he left, he wrote me this and left. Now I don't know where he is and I think it's too late."

"I thought you wanted him to leave, you said you were over and that you could never trust him again. Why is it bad that he left?"

"Because I love him more than anything. I don't know what to do without him in my life; he has been there for so long now that I don't know how to live without him with me. This last year has been torture and I really don't think I can go on like this. I have barely left my house and all I do is cry. I can't stop crying because the one person who can help me is the one that's making me cry." She said and once again fell to pieces in the chair, this time with her sister there trying to calm her but not knowing how.

**IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

**I SAID IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

Sami just cried for a while before Belle could convince her to head to the car and go home. It was the first time that someone came to Sami's rescue besides Ej and she was grateful for it, grateful that someone was trying to save her from the prison she put herself in. But all the while, trying to call his phone that she finally found out had been disconnected, it was too late!

Belle spent hours listening to Sami cry before she finally fell asleep on the couch out of sheer exhaustion. It was then that Belle seen the letter still in her hands and got it away just to read what it said. As she read she understood why Sami went running after Ej, she really did love him. Despite everything, she loved him and nothing was ever going to change that. Belle looked down at her sister and wished she had that courage, maybe if she did she wouldn't have lost Shawn to Mimi.

**I'D TAKE ANOTHER CHANCE, TAKE A FALL**

**TAKE A SHOT FOR YOU**

**AND I NEED YOU LIKE A HEART NEEDS A BEAT**

**BUT IT'S NOTHIN NEW**

**I LOVED YOU WITH A FIRE RED-**

**NOW IT'S TURNIGN BLUE, AND YOU SAY…**

"**SORRY" LIKE THE ANGEL HEAVEN LET ME THINK WAS YOU**

**BUT I'M AFRIAD…**

In Sami's dreams she had gotten to Ej in time and the two of them went back to her apartment where he told her he loved her and was putting her on a pedastool that no one would take her from. She had the love of her life and felt like the queen of his world, being put on a pedastool that only he would get her down from.

**I'TS TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

**I SAID IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

But then the dream turned into a nightmare as she fell from her pedastol and became what everyone always saw her as, the woman that no one wanted after a night. Just as he walked out of the door laughing, he smiled and said:

"It's too late, you blew it and we will never be what we were. You should have understood what it was like to lie to hold onto to someone you loved but you didn't and now its your turn to cry." He said and walked out of her apartment and out of her life. She instantly woke up screaming and Belle grabbed her.

"It was only a dream, calm down, it was just a dream."

"No no it was a nightmare. It's too late, I cant just apologize this time, it's too late for us. He's gone and I'm never going to find him." She said and cried harder, knowing that her dream was a sign, she lost him. He said he's always be there for her and she needed him now, she needed him to come back to her and he was no where to be found and the phone she relied on to call him to her was off. She was left alone in the cold and no longer knew what to do.

**I'TS TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

**I SAID IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, IT'S TOO LATE**

**IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, YEAH**

**I SAID IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE, YEAH-**

**I'M HOLING ON YOUR ROPE, GOT ME TEN FEET OFF THE GROUND…**

"Sami he loves you, this letter proves that. I've never known you to give up, nothing ever said you would give up, so fight for him. Don't be foolish and loose him like I lost Shawn, you will regret it for the rest of your life. Fight for him! You're the only one that can do this, he left because you told him to. Now tell him to come back!" She said and seen the smile crossing her sisters face, knowing that was exactly what Sami was going to do and for one happy that's who she was.


	7. Lets Be Us Again  Lonestar

"Lets Be Us Again" – Lonestar

Chapter 6 

Sami knew what she needed to do, she needed to fight, show him that they were worth fighting for and that she was foolish to throw away what they had. Yes, part of her was still angry about the way things ended and how their wedding day turned out. But it wasn't that he was a Dimera that was causing the pain, it was that he didn't trust her enough to tell her the truth.

**TELL ME WHAT I HAVE TO DO TONIGHT**

CAUSE I'D DO ANYTHING TO MAKE IT RIGHT 

**LETS BE US AGAIN**

"All you had to do was tell me and I would have put it past us. I would have been mad at first, but I would still be with you." She said and decided to go to Mythic and hand **deliver** a message for Ej. Sami made it a habit to call his cell phone daily, but only to have the same message: _This phone is no longer in service, _play back at her and make her hate technology. However, after a month of unanswered messages and a secretary who she knew was ignoring her calls, she decided to go down and see the staff face to face. Maybe even go to his office to see if there was a clue about his location.

**SORRY FOR THE WAY I LOST MY HEAD**

I DON'T KNOW WHY I SAID THE THINGS I SAID 

**LET'S BE US AGAIN**

Sami walked into the offices and went to walk past the secretary who stopped her and told her that she was not allowed to head to the back unless she was on the list.

"Look, I have called here everyday for the past month leaving message's for Mr. Wells and he had yet to get one. Now, I am sure you know who I am, and you know that he would return my message if he got them. Get out of my way."

"I wouldn't head to his office, Tony has taken over his job now and we both know how he feels about you." Kate Roberts said as she told the secretary that she would handle Sami.

"Kate, now I know we have had our differences, but that was mainly about your sons. From what I hear they are both Sami Free so would you like to tell me where Ej is so I can keep it that way?"

"No! Why would I do anything to help you?"

"Fine, I'll just go find Lucas, I heard he's pretty torn up about his divorce with Carrie, I'm sure he could use a friend." Sami said, knowing that Kate would do anything to keep her away from Lucas.

"Look I don't know where he is, Tony has taken over his job and no one speaks to him. I pass any messages to Tony and Tony gives them to Ej. No email or phone calls, it's like he on a deserted island. If you want to find him then you need to go to Stephano or Tony, they're the only ones that can tell you."

"Good girl Kate." Sami said and headed back to Tony's office, knowing there was something there that could help.

**HERE I STAND,**

**WITH EVERYTHING TO LOSE AND ALL I KNOW IS I DON'T EVER WANNA SEE THE END**

**BABY PLEASE I'M REACHING OUT FOR YOU**

**WON'T YOU OPEN UP YOUR HEART AND LET ME COME BACK IN**

**LETS BE US AGAIN**

Sami started going through the drawers first, looking for a scrap of paper with an address, or a hotel key. Anything that could help her, but there was nothing.

"Come on, there has to be something to help me, something to tell me where you are, I know you wouldn't just leave without anyone knowing how to find you." She said to herself and continued her search. Sami rifled through all the papers on his desk and looked around for an address book, but just as she found one Tony came into the room and she had to duck under the desk. "Damn it, why did he have to come back now!" She said as she dove under, hoping he didn't see her.

**LOOK AT ME, I'M WAY PAST PRIDE**

**ISN'T THERE SOME WAY THAT WE CAN TRY TO BE US AGAIN**

**EVEN IF IT TAKES AWHILE I'LL WAIT RIGHT HERE UNTIL I SEE THAT SMILE**

**THAT SAYS WE'S US AGAIN**

Tony sat in his chair without even looking at the way his office was different from the way he left it. He quickly got on a phone and Sami knew it was Ej. She wanted nothing more then to grab the phone from him or call out his name, but something told her not to. Something in the look on Tony's face assured her that it would not end well.

**AND HERE I STAND WITH EVERYTHING TO LOSE AND ALL I KNOW IS I DON'T WANNA EVER SEE THE END**

**BABY PLEASE I'M REACHING OUT FOR YOU **

**WON'T YOU OPEN UP YOUR HEART AND LET ME COME BACK IN**

**LETS BE US AGAIN**

As Tony talked to Ej, she never heard her name mentioned and she wasn't sure that Ej still wanted her. If he really wanted her, wouldn't he ask Tony how she was? If she was seeing anybody? How she looked? Something about their conversation scared her, until the end. When she knew that Tony was avoiding something, avoiding a subject and she just prayed it was her. That thought, the thought that Ej was asking about her, that gave her hope and the courage to do what was necessary. She decided to go see Stephano at the mansion and demand to know where Ej was. Stephano did want his son to be happy, she knew that much about him and she knew that no one could make him happy like she could.

**BABY, BABY WHAT WOULD I **

**CAN'T IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT YOU**

**HERE I STAND WITH EVERYTHING TO LOOSE AND ALL I KNOW IS I DON'T WANNA EVER SEE THE END**

When Tony left the office, she snuck out and headed home, smiling for the first time at knowing her plan would work.

**BABY PLEASE I'M REACHING OUT FOR YOU WON'T YOU OPEN UP YOUR HEART AND LET ME COME BACK IN**

**HERE I AM I'M REACHING OUT FOR YOU SO WON'T YOU OPEN UP YOUR HEART AND LET ME COME BACK IN  
**

"I'm coming Ej, I just wish I knew where to go and didn't have to go through your father to get you. Just know I'm coming! We'll be us again, I just need to prove myself first." She said and headed home to get ready, she needed to be sure of herself if she was ever going to tango with Stephano, he was never her biggest fan.

**LETS BE US AGAIN**

**OHH LETS BE US AGIN**


	8. Not Suppose to Love You  Bryan White

"I'm Not Suppose To Love You Anymore" – Bryan White

Chapter 7 

Ej had spent a month now, drinking and doing his best to forget her, spending morning running and nights in bars trying to get the whiskey to dull the memory, but when he woke up he could only see her face and smell her perfume.

**WE AGREED THAT IT WAS OVER,**

**NOW THE LINES HAVE BEEN DRAWN,**

**THE VOWS WE MAKE BEGAN TO FADE BUT NOW THEY'RE GONE.**

"Sami please, just listen to me, I know I should have told you, but I was so scared. You were so angry at my family, so afraid and I just never wanted you to look at me like that. Come on, just give me a chance. I'm not like them! I'm the man you always thought I was, I just have some skeleton's in my closet!" He remembered telling her the day after the "non" wedding. He spent that entire day outside her apartment, just trying to get her to talk to him and tell him that it was going to be ok. For once, he needed her more then she ever needed him.

**PUT YOUR PICTURES IN THE SHOEBOX,**

**MY GOLD RING IN THE DRAWER.**

**I'M NOT SUPPOSE TO LOVE YOU ANYMORE.**

As Ej spent another day thinking about her at the office, the urge to see her face became too strong and he found himself reaching in the top drawer to pull out her picture that use to be on his desk at Mythic. The same picture she gave him as a present, the picture she chose for his desk. He couldn't stand to have it on the desk anymore; it was too much for him. But sometimes, when the office was quiet, and his father wasn't around, he would take it out and look at it, wishing things were different.

"Samantha, I still miss you so much. I just wish I knew how you were." Like any other day, Stephano would come to see his son and always catch him talking to that damn picture, always as if she was standing next to him.

"Elvis, did you take care of what I asked?" He asked, knowing his son was oblivious to his presence at the door.

"No, Roberto is. I'm sure everything is fine." He answered after a minute and then shoved the picture back in his desk, next to the wedding ring he never got to put on her finger.

**NOW SHERRY SAYS SHE'S JEALOUS OF THE FREEDOM THAT I'VE FOUND.**

**IF SHE WAS ME SHE WOULD BE OUT ON THE TOWN, AND SHE SAYS SHE CAN'T IMAGINE**

**WHAT ON EARTH I'M WAITING FOR.**

**I'M NOT SUPPOSE TO LVOE YOU ANYMORE.**

"I asked you to do it, you two are over. You are free to be with anyone you want and yet you spend all your time drunk or starring at that damn picture. Go out and find someone else! You are a Dimera, start acting like it."

"Look, you've never been in love father so you don't understand but it is going to take me longer then a month to forget the only thing that ever made me happy. Racing, running things for you, being in business, none of that ever meant anything to me. Not the way Samantha did. She was more to me then any of that and it doesn't matter what you think, I will always love her."

"Fine, just don't let her turn you into this, I can't stand to even look at you like this anymore. You have become useless!"

"I will explain this again, and this will be the last time. She was my world and you took that away. She was not an obsession like her mother was for you, she was the love of my life. I can't control my feelings when it comes to her like you would be able to, and I am glad for that. It means I am real and vulnerable and that reminds me that I am human!" Ej paused for a moment hoping the suspense would make the words sink into his father's brain for once. The pause was also for him, just bringing her up broke his heart all over again and made him wince in pain at the sound of her name.

"Father look, I know she walked away from me, she made me look like a fool in front of the entire town. But, if she called me and asked me to come back I would. I would run to my car, head to the airport and never look back. There would be no pausing and thinking about it, no packing. Just me on a plane, and calling her to tell her I would be there soon. That's what she means to me. You just need to except that." Before Ej could yell anymore, Tony was on the phone and he hoped there would be news of Samantha in the report, he would know how she was.

**I SHOULDN'T CARE, WONDER WHERE, OR HOW YOU ARE**

**BUT I CAN'T HIDE THIS HURT INSIDE MY BORKEN HEART.**

**I'M FIGHTING BACK EMOTIONS I'VE NEVER FOUGHT BEFORE,**

**CAUSE I'M NOT SUPPOSE TO LOVE YOU ANYMORE.**

"Tony, how is she, have you seen her? Is she seeing anybody?" Ej got a glimmer of hope as Tony paused, but the light went out when Tony became indignant and ignored the line of questioning.

"Do you have the reports I needed on the business there?"

"Tony, I need to know. Please tell me anything, tell me something! I need to know!" He pleaded and Stephano just sat in shock, knowing him withholding her messages was never going to do it. He needed to remove her once and for all. Stephano headed out of the office and planned to call Tony to get his own plan into action, one to remove the pathetic man that became his son and return the strong and vengeful man he knew was there!

**NOW I'M WRITING YOU THIS LETTER AND ITS' KILLING ME TONIGHT,**

**THAT I AGREED WHEN YOU BELIEVED IT WASN'T RIGHT,**

**AND I COULDN'T SLEEP UP ON THE BED,**

**SO I'M DOWN HERE ON THE FLOOR.**

After hanging up with Tony, and watching Stephano close the door he tried to go back to work but it was useless. After he spoke of Samantha, nothing was possible for hours. He pulled the picture out again and starred at her face.

"Is it really over darling? Is this really where it ends for us? A month and no word, no call or message left at Mythic. I guess maybe I should accept you don't love me as much as I thought, we really are over this time." He said and moved his thumb over the cheek of her face, remembering how many times he had done it in the past.

**I SHOULDN'T CARE, WONDER WHERE, OR HOW YOU ARE**

**BUT I CAN'T HIDE THIS HURT INSIDE MY BROKEN HEART.**

**I'M FIGHTING BACK EMOTIONS I'VE NEVER FOUGHT BEFORE,**

**CAUSE I'M NOT SUPPOSE TO LOVE YOU ANYMORE.**

"When will I be able to go a day without looking at your picture? Or saying your name just to have my heart break as I remember you're gone. When will I really be able to move on and see that I did this for you." He said to himself and put away the picture for the day. Headed to the closet and decided to go for a run, maybe a run along the beach would clear his head, bring back the man his father wanted to see. Was it even possible anymore? Was the Dimera he was still there? Or was he just some lovesick fool? He didn't even know anymore.

**I'M FIGHTING BACK EMOTIONS I'VE NEVER FOUGHT BEFORE,**

**CAUSE I'M NOT SUPPOSE TO LOVE YOU ANYMORE.**


	9. Holding Out For a Hero  Bonnie Tyler

"Holding Out For a Hero" – Bonnie Tyler

Chapter 8 WHERE HAVE ALL THE GOOD MEN GONE 

**AND WHERE ARE ALL THE GODS?**

**WHERE'S THE STREET-WISE HHERCULES**

**TO FIGHT THE RISING ODD?**

**ISN'T THERE A WHITE KNIGHT UPON A FIERY STEED?**

**LATE AT NIGHT I TOSS AND TURN AND DREAM**

**OF WHAT I NEED**

"Ej why did you have to be a Dimera? Couldn't you just have a mother that hated me? I guess isn't stead of a mother in law that hates me, now I'll have a father in law that hates me." She said and looked up at the mansion again.Sami sat outside the Dimera mansion for over an hour before she got the courage to go inside, she just didn't know what to say. Or if they would even let her in, she was a traitor to them. Helping put Tony in jail years ago and knew she wasn't forgiven for that. When she seen someone headed for her car she knew it was now or never. She grabbed her purse, dropping her cell phone and headed to the door, taking a deep breath before knocking.

"Samantha Brady, what are you doing her?" Bart asked, and Sami just pushed her way past knowing he wouldn't be the one she needed. "Where is Tony? I know he's home." She said and headed for the living room to find him sitting on the couch drinking a glass of wine.

"Samantha, what can I help you with?"

"I want to talk to Ej! For some reason he isn't returning my messages that I leave with Mythic and we both know that's because he isn't getting him. Tell me where to find him." She said and made sure to keep her distance, remembering the time he threw her through the French doors.

I NEED A HERO 

**I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO 'TIL THE END OF THE NIGHT**

**HE'S GOTTA BE STRONG**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE FAST**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE FRESH FROM THE FIGHT**

**I NEED A HERO**

**I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO 'TIL THE MORNIGN LIGHT**

**HE'S GOTTA BE SURE**

**AND ITS' GOTTA BE SOON**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE LARGER THAN LIFE**

"He gets the messages, he's just too busy with his girlfriends to return them." Tony said and never even bothered to look up at her as he did it.

"We both know that's a lie, Ej loves me and no matter what I said to him, he would always come back to me. You want me to drop this, then he needs to tell me himself he doesn't love me. Then and only then will I let this drop!" She said and began to get the first in her eyes that Tony knew was there, it made him even smirk.

**SOMEWHERE AFTER MIDNIGHT**

**IN THE WILDEST FANTASY**

**SOMEWHERE JUST BEYOND MY REACH**

**THERE'S SOMEONE REACHING BACK FOR ME**

**RACING ON THE THUNDER END RISING WITH THE HEART**

**IT'S GONNA TAKE A SUPERMAN TO SWEEP ME OFF MY FEET**

"Too bad, he's not even in the country anymore. He took off, didn't he tell you goodbye?"

"Of course he told me goodbye, he also told me that he would come back if I asked and I am! Stop withholding my messages from him, and just tell me where he is damn it!" She said and threw the vase off the desk at the wall.

"Look, stop throwing your little tantrum and just go away." Tony said and called for Bart. "Bart, please show Ms. Brady to her new home." Tony said and before Sami knew what was happening Bart put a rag to her mouth and she was put in a secret room in the basement.

I NEED A HERO 

**I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO 'TIL THE END OF THE NIGHT**

**HE'S GOTTA BE STRONG**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE FAST**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE FRESH FROM THE FIGHT**

**I NEED A HERO**

**I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO 'TIL THE MORNIGN LIGHT**

**HE'S GOTTA BE SURE**

**AND ITS' GOTTA BE SOON**

**AND HE'S GOTTA BE LARGER THAN LIFE**

Sami didn't wake up for a couple hours and Tony was the first person she seen, sitting in a chair and laughing at her.

"Samantha you were right. Ej is still a complete fool for you, starring at your picture and wonders why you never called."

"You kept my messages, I knew it. But why? Wait, Stephano, he did this, he kept us apart. Didn't he?" She said and began to find her bearings again.

"Yes and it was also him that said I couldn't kill you so be grateful. He seems to think that might push Ej over the edge and that's not quite where he wants him, yet." 

"What is this, a game? A way to make Ej into something that he's not? He will only be that when he feels like he's got nothing else to loose…" with that Sami stopped, "That's it, you are going to make him think I'm dead just to get him to be what you want. Aren't you?" Sami said and knew she was right.

"You know, you would have made one hell of a Dimera. You always did have that mean streak in you. Sure you don't want to join the family again?" Tony joked and then made sure to turn on the television before he left. "Figured we'd give you a little entertainment, keep tabs on Ej through this and see for yourself what he really is." He said and then left, leaving her to pound on the door screaming.

"Just wait, he'll find me!" She screamed and then returned to the bed crying, hoping he would hear her plea.

**UP WHERE THE MOUTAINS MEET THE HEAVENS ABOVE**

**OUT WHERE THE LIGHTENING SPLITS THE SEA**

I WOULD SWEAR THAT THERE'S SOMEONE SOMEWHERE 

**WATCHING ME**

"He'll come for me I know he will and when he does you better hide. Because I can assure you Tony, Ej will find me and when he does. You will wish that you were dead because there is nothing that will protect you from him. Watch, just watch when he finds out I'm gone! You won't know what hit you." She said and walked to the other side of the room, sure that he would rescue her like he always had.

THROUGH THE WIND AND THE CHILL AND THE RAIN 

**AND THE STORM AND THE FLOOD**

**I CAN FEEL HIS APPROACH**

**LIKE THE FIRE IN MY BLOOD  
**


	10. Almost Lover Fine Frenzy

"Almost Lover" – Fine Frenzy

Chapter 9 

Tony called to give Stephano the news, Samantha's car was run off the road and the body found was mistaken for hers thanks to a friend at the morgue. Stephano just laughed as he heard the news, knowing it was only a matter of time before he would tell Ej and he would have his son back again. All Stephano wanted was for Ej to be the heir to the Dimera legacy, but all Ej wanted was Samantha back in his life.

"Good, I will tell Ej. Be ready for us to return to Salem , we both know there will be no stopping him when he heard of her untimely death." He said and hung up to go see his son. Ej was as usual, starring off into space, looking pathetic as Stephano walked into the room unnoticed. He did feel bad for his son, knowing that this conversation would not go well between them.

**YOUR FINGERTIPES ACROSS MY SKIN,**

**THE PALM TREES SWAYING IN THE WIND**

**IMAGES**

**YOU SANG ME SPANISH LULLABIES,**

**THE SWEETEST SADNESS IN YOUR EYES**

**CLEVER TRICK**

"Father please, I really am not in the mood to argue. Just leave me alone today." He said and Stephano just ignored him and sat in the chair on the other side of the room.

"I'm afraid I have something you need to hear. Tony just called with news from Salem , its Samantha." He said and at the sound of her name Ej's ears perked up and he looked over at his father, getting up and walking to the other side of the desk. A smile crossing his face for the first time in over a year.

"What? Did she leave me a message? Does she want me to come back?"

**I'D NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU UNHAPPY,**

**I THOUGHT YOU'D WANT THE SAME FOR ME**

"I'm sorry, but it's bad news. There was an accident, her car was run off the road and she didn't make it. She's dead Elvis." Stephano said, not trying to make it easy on him at all. Just matter of factly telling him she was dead and there was no use holding out for hope anymore.

**GOODBYE MY ALMOST LOVER**

**GOODBYE MY HOPELESS DREAM**

**I'M TRYING NOT TO THINK ABOUT YOU**

**CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME BE?**

**SO LONG MY LUCKLESS ROMANCE**

**MY BACK IS TURNED ON YOU**

**I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU'D BRING ME HEARTACHE,**

**ALMOST LOVERS ALWAYS DO**

"No, she can't be dead. She would fight to live, she would never give up without a fight and I would know. I would know if she was dead." He said and felt his knees go weak as he went to fall, using the desk to brace himself he knew what he had to do. "You're lying, I'm going back to Salem to find her, I will find her. She needs me and I can feel that." He finished and then took off for his car, nearly running someone over as he peeled tire out of the lot and to the airport.

Once at the airport, Ej called Tony, hoping against hope that it was a lie, she was alive and he could go to her and try once again to convince her to let him come home. However, Tony just reiterated what Stephano said and he was feeling the death encircle him all over again. He just had this feeling that she wasn't dead, that she was just waiting for him, out there somewhere holding out for her hero.

**WE WALKED ALONG A CROWDED STREET**

**YOU TOOK MY HAND AND DANCED WITH ME**

**IMAGES**

**AND WHEN YOU LEFT YOU KISSED MY LIPS**

**YOU TOLD ME YOU WOULD NEVER **

**EVER FORGET THESE IMAGES, NO**

As Ej sat in the bar drinking, he heard the call for the plane and almost didn't want to go. He wanted nothing more then to live in denial, believe she just didn't love him anymore. Somehow that notion was the only thing saving him right now, hurt he could deal with, even dying, but not death. Especially not this way, it just wasn't fair to her and he would make someone pay for it.

"Samantha, look at what I've done to you. I left to give you space and now you're gone. This is my fault, I always drove, I could have saved you." He said as he realized the reality of things as he found an article online via his phone about the murder and let the reality sink in. As he poured himself into his seat on the plane, he felt his heart break all over again. The day he left, the days together, all their memories came rushing to him and it took everything he had to stop himself from falling to pieces on the plane.

**I'D NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU UNHAPPY**

**I THOUGHT YOU'D WANT THE SAME FOR ME**

**GOODBYE MY ALMOST LOVER**

**GOODBYE MY HOPELESS DREAM**

**I'M TRYING NOT TO THINK ABOUT YOU**

**CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME BE?**

**SO LONG MY LUCKLESS ROMANCE**

**MY BACK IS TURNED ON YOU**

**I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU'D BRING ME HEARTACHE,**

**ALMOST LOVERS ALWAYS DO**

"Ej, wake up, come on now. You have to get to work sometimes. Come on, you're already late enough." She said as she tried waking him up like usual. Ej never wanted to leave when he had spent the night with Samantha. Work just never seemed as important as holding her all day and making love to her all over again.

"No, I'm not going in today, come here." He would tell her and pull her back to bed and into his arms. She would always protest at first but it would falter and they would spend the day locked in her bedroom. Now that was just a memory, just a reminder of what he so foolishly gave up. A memory without a future! Samantha would always be a phantom from his past that would always haunt him, asleep or awake.

**I CANNOT GO TO THE OCEAN**

**I CANNOT DRIVE THE STREETS AT NIGHT**

**I CANNOT WAKE UP IN THE MORNING**

**WITHOUT YOU ON MY MIND**

**SO YOU'RE GONE AND I'M HAUNTED**

**AND I'LL BET YOU ARE JUST FINE,**

**DID I MAKE IT THAT EASY**

**TO WALK IN AND OUT**

**OF MY LIFE?**

While Ej was on the plane ride over, he spent the entire 15 hours reliving all their times together, from this first meeting in the hall to the night he left and gave her his heart on paper for her to read and threw away. But he could care less about that now, he would do anything to bring her back now.

**GOODBYE MY ALMOST LOVER**

**GOODBYE MY HOPELESS DREAM**

**I'M TRYING NOT TO THINK ABOUT YOU**

**CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME BE?**

**SO LONG MY LUCKLESS ROMANCE**

**MY BACK IS TURNED ON YOU**

**I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU'D BRING ME HEARTACHE,**

**ALMOST LOVERS ALWAYS DO **


	11. Goodbye My Friend Linda Ronstadt

"Goodbye My Friend" – Linda Ronstadt

Chapter 10

As Salem prepared for Sami's funeral, the town was a buzz with the story of what happened. No one quite knew what really happened that night, only that she was run off the road a short distance from her apartment. There were no witnesses and her "body" was left unrecognizable and dental records confirmed the id. As Sami's family piled into the church, it was a shocking sight to see so many of her ex-husbands all in the front row to pay their respects.

**OH WE NEVER KNOW WHERE LIFE WILL TAKE US**

**I KNOW IT'S JUST A RIDE ON THE WHEEL.**

**AND WE NEVER KNOW WHEN DEATH WILL SHAKE UP**

**AND WE WONDER HOW IT WILL FEEL.**

"Samantha was truly her own person. She never would let anything get in the way of what she wanted and I guess I always admired that about her. I never thought I would be here, saying goodbye to a women I walked out on years ago, but when I heard what happened I knew it was where I belonged." Brandon said and walked up to the coffin, placing a hang on it as he finished. "Samantha I have missed you and I think a part of me will always love you. I just wish I had the chance to tell you I forgave you a long time ago for what happened and what you did."

**SO GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

**I KNOW I'LL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN**

**BUT THE TIME TOGETHER THROUGH ALL THE YEARS**

**WILL TAKE AWAY THESE TEARS**

Austin was the next to talk and his speech was different. It wasn't the heart felt one of Brandon, but he wasn't being rude either. He came out of respect for the family he married into when he and Carrie finally got their fairy tale ending.

"Me and Sami have been through a lot over the years, some good and some bad. But regardless, she helped me build my company to what it is and for that I will always be grateful. No matter what scheme she was planning, or hiding from being uncovered, she was always a loving and caring person. She just didn't exactly know how to show that without doing some things that were questionable." He said and didn't even go to her coffin, just went back and sat next to Carrie who was trying not to cry.

"Me and Sami before we were anything were friends and that friendship seemed to faultier as we gave into anger we had for our past. But no matter what we put each other through, or how we felt for one another, we loved our son more than anything. You can say whatever you want about Sami, but she was a good mother and she loved Will more than anything. He was the most important thing to her and I wish I had seen that before now. Maybe then we could have been there to save her from something that was malicious and unfair." Lucas said and Will came up to join him, pulling strength from his father as he said goodbye to his mother.

**ITS OK NOW…**

**GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

"I spent most of my life confused at who my family was and which guy my mom would stay with. But I always knew she loved me, I just wish I had the chance to tell her I love her. To tell her that she was a great mom when she wasn't trying too hard and that I'm going to miss her. You only get one mom and I just wish I had the chance to have the kind of relationship I always wanted." He paused and Lucas hugged him and the two returned to their seats, only to have Marlena rise to speak.

"Thank you all for coming, I know my daughter doesn't have the best reputation around here and has done some things I wish I could forget, but she was still my daughter. It just means a lot to me that so many people would come here to say things about her and how much she was loved, even if it was in each of our own special way. Sami, I will miss you." She said and kissed the coffin, saying goodbye to her daughter for the last time. Hope got up to speak and so did Caroline, but the last was Roman and he didn't have the best words for her. He was still upset over what Sami did to Carrie and just wasn't sure how to let go when his daughter wasn't there to hash it out, but John came up and made sure his words were not in vain.

"Sami Gene and I had a unique relationship. I loved her unconditionally and she hated the mere sight of me, but I was really hoping to change that before I died and I guess she beat me to it. I thought I was getting to her but I guess I should have tried harder. Guess she finally got the last word. Whatever any of you thinks I'm really going to miss her, she sure as hell made life interesting." He said and before he made it to his seat Ej came busting through the doors, headed for the front of the church. Marlena went to grab him but Belle stopped her.

**I SEE A LOT OF THINGS THAT MAKE ME CRAZY**

**AND I GUESS I HELD ON TO YOU**

**I COULD OF RUN AWAY AND LEFT**

**WELL, MAYBE…**

**BUT IT WASN'T TIME WE BOTH KNEW**

"He belongs here just as much as anyone else, more so for the fact Sami loved him." She said and John followed his daughter's eyes and returned to his pew.

"I know I am not welcome here by any of you but she would want me here. I don't care what she said to me at the end or how much she told me she hated me, she loved me and that is enough to deal with everything that you are putting me through now. I loved her more than anything and left to give her the space that she wanted and needed, but look at what it's done. I always drove her and if I was still here then this wouldn't have happened, I would be in here darling instead of you." He said as he put his hand over the coffin and stared at the cold mahogany.

"Darling I promise you, I will find out who did this to you and they will pay for it, you didn't deserve this. No matter what you've done in your past you don't deserve this. Your death will not be for nothing!" He said and went back to the front of the church, tears now brimming in his eyes. "Sorry to interrupt, but I had to be here for her. No matter what you think of me, she was the best thing to ever come into my life and I was too foolish to realize it then. But I do now and I will always treasure her. The memories we made will always be the best I ever had. I'm sorry for your loss." He said and headed out, heading to his car but breaking down before he ever got there. Belle had come out after him and found him in the garden, sitting on a bench trying his best to hold back the tears he knew were inevitable.

**SO GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

**I KNOW I'LL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN**

**BUT THE LOVE YOU GAVE ME THROUGH ALL THE YEARS**

**WILL TAKE AWAY THESE TEARS**

"Ej, if you loved her so much, then why didn't you come back when she called?"

"What? She never called me, I called Mythic everyday to see if she left me a message and they always said she didn't. Tony told me she was seeing someone else…" Ej froze as he said it, only now realizing what was going on. "They never told me she called. Everyone kept telling me to forget her and to leave it alone, that she didn't love me anymore."

"Ej she came after you, the day you left the letter. The night you left, she went to the airport. She was coming after you but it was too late. She said she got there just as you were taking off and felt it was a sign that she waited too long, it was too late!"

**ITS NOW…**

**GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

"Belle it was never too late. All she had to do was call me and I would have came home to her. I would have dropped everything and my father knew it. He knew that I would have given everything up if she asked me too, there was no way I would pass up a chance at forgiveness from your sister. She was my everything."

"I guess it's too late. She died trying to find you."

"What do you mean?"

"That night, she was headed to the mansion, she said she was going to force Tony to tell her where you were, she was adamant that it would be the last night she spent alone. But, she never made it, she died before she ever got the chance." Belle said and then wished she wouldn't have, she could see the guilt building up in Ej and knew there was no stopping it now. He was a loss cause without Sami, without his moral compass helping him see the light, not the darkness of the Dimera Empire.

**LIFE'S SO FRAGILE AND LOVE'S SO PURE**

**WE CAN'T HOLD ON BUT WE TRY**

**WE WATCH HOW QUICKLY IT DISAPPEARS**

**AND WE NEVER KNOW WHY**

Ej left the service and headed to the mansion to confront Tony. He wanted to know the truth about why he never got Samantha's messages. He may have just said goodbye to Samantha, but he was not going to say goodbye without making his brother pay for what he did. On the trip he went to the pier and sat on the bench where they tangoed, unable to go home yet.

**BUT I'M OK NOW**

**GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

**I CAN GO NOW**

**GOODBYE MY FRIEND**

"Darling if I could I would switch places with you in a heartbeat and let you see that I never meant to hurt you. More then anything I just wanted to protect you, not let you see what I really was, what my family was. I'm just sorry I never got that chance. Goodbye my darling, goodbye my friend!" He said and threw a coin into the water, making a wish that he could change destiny and bring Samantha back to him.


	12. Hole Kelly Clarkson

"Hole" – Kelly Clarkson

Chapter 11

TIRED

OF EVERYTHING AROUND ME

I SMILE

BUT I DON'T FEEL A THING NOW

Samantha lay on her bed after watching a tape of her funeral and spent the next night crying. Knowing that her son loved her was the one thing that came to a surprise to her. She just wished she had the time to tell him everything she always knew she should. But Ej, what he said meant just as much because it made her remember the man she fell in love with and that was everything to her.

I'M SO FAR FROM WHERE I NEED TO BE

I'VE GIVEN UP ON FAITH, ON EVERYTHING

ALL I WANT, ALL I NEED

IS SOME PEACE

Sami tried her best to pull herself together. She needed to stay calm and collected. That was the only way to get out of the mess she was in. There was no way around it, she would always be connected to the Dimera's, but she never thought they would go after her. Ej would never allow this and she could tell from the funeral tape that he didn't know. He had no clue what they had done to her.

"I knew you still loved me. I just wish it didn't take this to make me see what we really had. I know you can find me, I have faith in that. Come back to me." She said and reached to touch the monitor as he walked into the den and she seen his face. She knew doing anything but cry was impossible now. It had been days since she was kidnapped and all she could do was sit and cry. Tony would visit as little as possible and left Bart to do all the delivering to her.

THERE'S A HOLE

INSIDE OF ME

IT'S SO COLD

SLOWLY KILLING ME

"Look Sami, I'd love to let you go but we both know it's not possible."

"Why because Ej will kill you when he finds out?" She said and thought to what she now knew. Stephano had orchestrated all of this to keep them apart in an attempt to get his son back. She knew that when she got out she would have to tell him the truth, she couldn't lie anymore, especially not to him! Not that he wouldn't have seen through it.

SECRETS

EATING AT THE CORE OF ME

SHUT OFF

TRUSTING ALL THE LIES I BREATHE

"Well ya. Tony would yell at me and Stephano would threaten to shoot me, but Ej is a different story. He loves you more than we ever thought. This is really going to kill him when he finds out what his family did, I just hope you will tell him to go easy on me because I've been nice to you. Stephano will let you go home eventually, he always does."

"What makes you think that I can control him? And when will I get out, after Ej finds someone new?" She said and headed back to bed, thinking of Ej with anyone but her terrified her. She knew she could never handle it.

"Sami, Ej wasn't suppose to fall in love with you. Love is not something the Dimera's do because it always leads to problems. Stephano got sloppy when he fell for you mother, Tony when he fell in love with Anna. But Ej was the worst because when he fell for you he wanted to give up the family and that couldn't happen. You don't walk away from the Dimera family, not until you are buried six feet under. Stephano wasn't willing to let his son walk away."

I'M SO FAR FROM WHERE I NEED TO BE

I'VE GIVEN UP ON FAITH, ON EVERYTHING

ALLI WANTED, ALL I NEEDED

WAS SOME PEACE

"He'll never be that man again, I know that in my heart. He is still angry at Stephano for stopping our wedding and humiliating me in front of the entire town."

"Ya, but that anger is now aimed at Victor and Stephano is a means to revenge for him."

"Victor? Wait what does Victor have to do with any of this?"

"He was the one that ordered the hit on you Sami. As far as Ej knows, Victor is the reason you were taken away."

"So Ej thinks Victor kept my messages away too? Because we both know that is only going to make things worse. I hope that secretary gets out of dodge, he will be on the war path thinking he lost his chance to fix things. To save me!" She said and took a bite of toast off the tray. But the satisfaction she got from scaring Bart just made her feel worse when she realized where she was, in a prison!

THERE'S A HOLE

INSIDE OF ME

IT'S SO DAMN COLD

SLOWLY KILLING ME

"Lets just say that he hasn't found out yet. Or at least I don't have knowledge of it." Bart said and paused when he heard a door slam. "That can't be good. I'm going to have to leave you for a while darling. But don't worry I will be back with dinner and some fresh sheets."

SINKING EVER SO SLOWLY

SO FAR FROM WHERE I SHOULD BE

NO HANDS REACHING OUT FOR ME

HELP ME, HELP ME

"About that, can I have some clothes? Three days crying in a cell makes you want to get a shower." She said and sat back down on the edge of the bed.

SOMETHING'S GONE

I CAN FEEL IT

IT'S ALL WRONG

I'M SO SICK OF THIS

"Closet is over here, surprised you haven't found it before." Bart said and left the room where Sami went over to the television to get an idea of what the banging was. Then she seen it, Ej was storming through the house looking for Tony and she could tell he found out about the messages.

"He'll find me, he won't leave me here." She said and touched his face on the screen. "He'll find me, he has to." She said and looked at him, she was starting to see what her death did to him. He looked like he hadn't slept in days and she knew it was because of her.

THERE'S A HOLD

INSIDE OF ME

IT'S SO COLD

SLOWLY KILLING ME

THERE'S A HOLE

INSIDE OF ME

IT'S SO DAMN COLD

SLOWLY KILLING ME

"I swear to God, when I get out of here Stephano is going to pay for this, for what he did to both of us." She said and threw a pillow across the room. She headed to the bathroom but turned to see Ej one more time, but his face was different. Gone were the calm collected expressions he used to wear, the only thing left was anger, pure bitter hatred!


	13. Missionary Man Eurythmics

"Missionary Man" - Eurythmics

Chapter 12 

Over the next six months Sami saw Ej slowly turn into a man she barely recognized. Gone were the loving eyes that use to make her weak and gone was the body she loved to run her hands over. The man she loved was slowly fading away and it made her sick. She didn't even know what she was fighting for anymore, her Ej was gone and probably would never come back to her.

**WELL I WAS BORN AN ORIGIANL SINNER**

**I WAS BORN FROM ORIGIANL SIN**

AND IF I HAD A DOLLAR BILL 

**FOR ALL THE THINGS I'VE DONE**

**THERE'D BE A MOUNTIAN OF MONEY**

**PILED UP TO MY CHIN…**

As Sami watched as the days went by she couldn't believe what his father had turned him into, nothing more then a missionary man, someone to do his bidding when he didn't feel like it. She could barely see him on the screen without getting upset at the television and turning it off to just cry in bed as she thought about what she lost.

"Ej, I never thought you would let him get to you and bring you to this. You promised me that you weren't capable of this, even when I knew what you were I never thought you could be this, stoop to this." She would say as she cried herself to sleep.

**MY MOTHER TOLD ME GOOD**

**MY MOTHER TOLD ME STRONG**

**SHE SAID BE TRUE TO YOURSELF**

**AND YOU CANT GO WRONG**

Sami wasn't the only one to notice how much Ej had changed, even Bart and Tony seen how bad things were getting. He wasn't strategic or careful in his planning, he became reckless and heartless as if he had nothing left to loose. He was no longer strong or confidant in his actions, but became rather pathetic how he took orders without question and just went along with anything his father told him to do. He wasn't a man anymore, he was a pawn on his father's chessboard and only Sami seemed to notice it.

**BUT THERE'S JUST ONE THING**

**THAT YOU MUST UNDERSTAND**

**YOU CAN FOOL WITH YOUR BROTHER**

**BUT DON'T MESS WITH A MISSIONARY MAN**

Ej spent most of his days following his father's orders and nights trying to rid himself of the memory that wouldn't go away. There wasn't amount of whiskey in the world that could stop the dreams of the life he wanted with Samantha. But as the months passed he tried to move on, with one girl or another, but it all ended the same way, him calling them Samantha and them storming out angry, leaving him feeling more unwanted and ruthless then every.

"What were you doing? You were supposed to be going after Victor Kiriakis!" Ej yelled at Bart, one night. He had given Bart orders, but so had Tony to take care of Sami and that was the order he chose to follow. "Answer me?" Ej said and Bart could tell that no matter what answer he gave it wasn't going to end well for him.

"Tony had me taking care of something and it took a little longer then I thought but I know that Tony said he would take care of Kiriakis." He said but it was too late, he could feel the blow before he ever seen Ej's fist. As Ej continued to yell and hit Bart, Tony came in to break everything up.

**DON'T MESS WITH A MISSIONARY MAN**

**DON'T MESS WITH A MISSIONARY MAN**

"Elvis! That's enough I told Bart to take care of something per Stephano's orders. Now back off!" He yelled and EJ just stormed out of the room and headed straight to the door. Both knowing he was headed for his car to go straight to the nearest bar.

"I really think this is getting out of hand, he has completely lost it." Bart said, feeling the blood that was coming from his eye.

"For once I think you might actually be right. You should go see Dr. Rolf and get him to stitch up your eye."

"Ya, but I think Stephano needs to let Sami go, I mean Ej doesn't seem like he is getting over Sami any time soon. Six months and he still brings her flowers every week."

"Still? I mean I know he did when she first died, but I figured he stopped after the first month. Is he at least having affairs like normal Dimera's?" 

"Not for a while now. He calls them Samantha, they leave all made and he downs a bottle of scotch. It's actually getting kind of sad."

"That's it, you go to Dr. Rolf and then Samantha, I need to go confront my father." Tony said and the two parted.

**WELL THE MISSIONARY MAN**

**HE'S GOT GOD ON HIS SIDE**

**HE'S GOT THE SAINTS AND APOSTLES**

**BACKIN UP FROM BEHIND**

**BLACK EYED LOOKS FROM THOSE BIBLE BOOKS**

As Tony walked into his father's study he turned off the opera music and confronted his father about what Ej was turning into.

"Antony what is the matter with you? No one interrupts my opera, not even my own son!" He said angrily.

"Shut up! This is important it's about Elvis he just attacked Bart. For months now I have seen him fall to pieces and loose all the focus he once had. He has become a loose cannon, someone we can no longer control! Losing her did more damage then we ever thought it would."

"A bit of a loose cannon yes, but he's a true Dimera. Taking out his own feelings on his enemies, or rather my enemy." Stephano said with a smirk as he thought about all the hell that Elvis has put Victor through over the last couple of months. "However, there is no letting that little twit go. He no longer asks questions, or threatens to abandon the family. Elvis is finally being what he was meant to be, my pawn." Stephano said and dismissed the topic, but Tony wasn't giving up that easily.

**HE'S A MAN WITH A MISSION**

**GOT A SERIOUS MIND**

**THERE WAS A WOAMN IN THE JUNGLE**

**AND A MONKEY ON A TREE**

**THE MISSIONARY MAN HE FOLLOWIN ME**

**HE SAID STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING**

**GET DOWN UP ON YOUR KNEES**

**I'VE GOT A MESSAGE FOR YOU THAT YOU BETTER BELIEVE**

"He attacked Bart! I know we all have wanted to over the years, but he is loyal and didn't deserve that. He's with Dr. Rolf now getting stitches. You need to talk to your son. Have you noticed that he still goes to her grave? Just to bring her flowers and can't handle a relationship or even a one nightstand without calling the woman Samantha. He is entirely gone!"

"Tony, this is not up for discussion. I know you are not fond of Samantha, but she will be remaining with us until your brother can seem to get out from under her spell. Then and only then will I let her go." He said and left the room, making that his final word.

"How the hell am I suppose to get rid of her if he won't even give up her memory? Even death can't seem to separate them." Tony said angrily, and then stormed out of the room himself.

**DON'T MESS WITH A MISSIONARY MAN**

DON'T MESS WITH A MISSIONARY MAN 

Ej on the other hand was doing exactly what Tony and Bart had predicted, sitting in the Cheatin' Heart, downing shot after shot. When anyone came near him, or the dartboard he was using a fight would erupt and he would throw money on the floor.

"For the mess." He said and after the third fight decided to leave. Walking out and getting back in his car, headed for another bar, another drink. Another anything to get her laugh out of his head, her smile, her voice. Everything that she was that kept playing over and over in his mind driving him crazy.

"Please just give me the night Samantha, give me a night to not be tortured by your memory." He said as he put his head on the she steering wheel, feeling the drinks take affect, but only making things worse.

After Bart finished with Dr. Rolf, he went to bring Sami dinner. Bart walked in the room and Sami immediately walked up to him genuinely concerned about what happened to him. Call it loneliness but she thought of Bart as a friend. He always was nice to her and did his best to make her comfortable in the room she was held in. Plus, she couldn't imagine Tony ever being as kind.

"What happened?"

"Ej got upset that I wasn't following his orders so he took it out on my face. But I'm fine, Tony came and got him to go away. One good thing came out of it, Tony is going to try and convince Stephano to let you go. Seems like you're the only one who can control him."

"Not anymore, Stephano wanted a monster let him have him to control. I'm going home when I get out of here, to my family and the people that love me and want to protect me. There will be no looking back." She said and paused, looking at the screen on the television, hoping to see his face one last time. "He doesn't' love me anymore." She said and went to sit on the bed.

"Hell if he doesn't! Still brings you flowers every Sunday, just now to your grave instead of to you."

"What?"

"Look if I can prove he loves you and there's hopes to control him, will you stay?" He asked knowing Ej was due at the cemetery to visit her grave the following day.

"Depends on what happens when I get out, I just don't see my Ej anymore." She said, and looked right at Bart.

"Deal." He said and shook her hand, knowing she still loved Ej and that meant there was a chance at her staying after all was said and done.


	14. Ghost of Me and You BBmak

"Ghost of You and Me" - BBmak Chapter 13 

**WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO**

**WITH ALL THESE BLUES**

**HAUNTING ME, EVERYWHERE, NO MATTER WHAT I DO**

**WATCHING THE CANDLE FLICKER OUT IN THE EVENING GLOW**

**I CAN'T LET GO**

**WHEN WILL THIS NIGHT BE OVER**

Ej woke up with a nasty hangover Sunday morning and looked at the clock to see it was almost noon. He was going to be late if he didn't hurry, he looked over at the photo on his bed and picked it up to see her face again. Not that he could have forgot it, it haunted his every moment, awake or asleep all he could think about his Samantha.

**I DIDN'T MEAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU**

**AND BABY THERE'S A NAME FOR WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH**

**IT ISN'T LOVE, ITS ROBBERY**

**I'M SLEEPING WITH THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME**

"My dear Samantha, how I miss you." He said and put the picture back before heading to get ready. Get a shower and shave before picking up the flowers at the door to place on her grave. As he got in his car and headed there he felt as if he were dying inside, going to see grave just reassured him that she was gone and he was alone. As he walked up to the grave, he took a deep breath to make sure he could do this again.

"Darling I still miss you more than ever. You were the best thing that I ever had. You thought I kept you on the straightened arrow, well it was just the opposite, you kept me in line. Always leaving the Dimera Legacy at the door and being free to be myself, to be Ej Wells. I never wanted to bring that danger or life near you and I hope you know that, even if it took me telling you to your grave." He said and paused as he changed the flowers in the vase and tried to wipe away the tears that were starting to fall.

"You were too precious for any of that and I just wish I could tell you." He stopped again, but this time he just couldn't seem to find the words, didn't know what to say to tell her how sorry he was and how much he wanted her back. That he would give anything to bring her back, his own life if necessary, just to feel her alive again, see her walk into a room, lighting it up with her smile. That was all that mattered anymore, her coming back!

**SEEN A LOT OF BROKEN HEARTS GO SAILING BY**

**PHANTOM SHIPS, LOST AT SEA**

**AND ONE OF THEM IS MINE**

**RAISING MY GLASS, I SING A TOAST TO THE MIDNIGHT SKY**

**I WONDER WHY**

**THE STARTS DON'T SEEM TO GUIDE ME**

As the guilt began to eat at him he could only think about their wedding, the day that determined the rest of their life and the day he lost her completely.

Samantha ran out of the church and not one person went after her, not her mother to try and comfort her, or her sister to tell her it was all going to be ok. They just all stood there starring at him, and for the first time he felt like the most honorable person in the room.

"Go after her! I know that she wasn't nothing to do with me right now but someone needs to make sure she is ok. She needs someone to help her calm down!" He said and starred around to see no one move, then after moments of silence her brother Eric stood up and walked over to him. Decking him and making him fall back towards the pew.

"Sure I'll go after her and you better stay the hell away!" he said and ran out to go find his sister. Ej never said a word as he got up and put a hand to his jaw. He deserved that and wouldn't respect Eric if he didn't hit him.

"And you, I told you that I wanted nothing to do with you or this family. Samantha was my family and you were to stay the hell away from both of us. I may not be able to get rid of you as a father but I will be damned if you keep me from the woman I love." He said and went to the altar, the one he shared moments ago with Samantha.

"I will never forgive you for this! You took away the one thing that meant the most to me, for what? Because I wasn't willing to be your pawn and play out your sick game of chess, because there was something more important to me than this twisted family?"

**I DIDN'T MEAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU**

**AND BABY THERE'S A NAME FOR WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH**

**IT ISN'T LOVE, ITS ROBBERY**

**I'M SLEEPING WITH THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME**

"You were not suppose to fall in love with her! Plus, she left you, she walked out when she found out what you were, I told you she would never accept you. Now come home to your family and leave this sick obsession behind!" He said and Ej walked right up to him, grabbing the lapel of his jacket and slamming him back into the wall.

"I know what I was suppose to do, but in case you have never noticed, love doesn't happen because you want it to or because you find someone you think would be good for you. It's something you can't control and I won't apologize for that. And as far as you, we are not family! You are a disease to me and I will never come back." He said and walked out of the church, jumping in his car and headed to her apartment to beg forgiveness.

**THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME**

**WHEN WILL IT SET ME FREE**

**I HEAR THE VOICES CALL**

**FOLLOWING FOOTSTEPS DOWN THE HALL**

**TRYING TO SAVE WHAT'S LEFT OF MY HEART AND SOUL**

As Ej came out of his temporary trance from the day of their wedding, he couldn't help but cry as he thought about all he had done to her, all the pain he put her through with his lies. Even the threat he made to his father that he broke now, working for him, being the one thing he despised. But it didn't matter anymore, he had nothing left to loose.

"You know, I still wake up every morning looking for you. Look at your picture on my nightstand and think that you're just in the bathroom. That you are going to come back into my arms and nothing ever tore us apart." He paused to get up and stared back down at the stone. "I wish I could stay Samantha, sit here all day and tell you everything I never got a chance to say. But, if I stay any longer I won't be able to leave, because my heart can only break so many times before I cant find the pieces anymore. Every time I look at what I have done to you, you died trying to find me and forever I will feel guilty for that."

Ej bent down and put his hand on the stone, feeling the coldness it held and just broke all over again. "Darling, every time I even look at this stone my heart falls to pieces and I wish I could trade places with you. We both know I deserve to pay for my sins, not you. In my dreams darling, forever in my dreams I have you, holding me and telling me you understand why I did what I did." Ej tried to walk away, but he felt like there was more to say, more to say to spill the guilt that would forever sit in his heart.

**WATCHING THE CANDLE FLICKER OUT IN THE EVENING GLOW**

**I CAN'T LET GO**

**WHEN WILL THE NIGHT BE OVER**

"Just know that I would have came back, had my father given me the messages I would have came back. I wanted you more than anything, I was just too foolish to see what he was doing. I should have called you, I should have called to check on you, or at least call Belle. I'm so sorry darling, but know that I will always love you. From now until forever you will always hold my heart in your hands and forever haunt my dreams with your memory." He said and finally pulled himself away from the grave, knowing staying would only hurt worse. He loved her more than anything, but there was no way to tell her that any more then how he already had. He knew in his heart that she knew, she knew what she was to him. As he headed back to his car, he never noticed the camera by the headstone behind Sami's, the one capturing everything that Sami could now see.

**I DIDN'T MEAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU**

**AND BABY THERE'S A NAME FOR WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH**

**IT ISN'T LOVE, ITS ROBBERY**

**I'M SLEEPING WITH THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME**

Sami sat on the floor in front of the monitor, watching him at her grave and crying as she did. She had never seen anything sadder in her life, Ej crying was not a sight she had ever seen, not even at her funeral and she could see why. He looked so vulnerable, as if he would break it someone touched him. As she touched the screen, she longed to see his face again but it was black now.

**I DIDN'T MEAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU**

**AND BABY THERE'S A NAME FOR WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH**

**IT ISN'T LOVE, ITS ROBBERY**

**I'M SLEEPING WITH THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME**

Sami sat on the floor for hours, just crying and thinking about how different her life had been just a couple years before. How in love she was, and how she thought she would spend the rest of her life with Ej. But now that was gone and she was alone, even a year after her wedding she was still madly in love with him. Time apart couldn't kill their love and she was so upset with herself for ever betraying that love. If anyone needed to apologize it was her, she needed to take responsibility for what she did. She made him leave and she went to the mansion to find him. This wasn't his fault, her being held prisoner was the punishment she had to pay and she was willing, if it would bring him back.

All Ej had to do was say her name and she would run into his arms, forgetting all the betrayal and deceit and just go to the nearest church for the wedding they never had. She just couldn't imagine why she waited so long, why did she wait until it was too late to realize what they were to each other, so what if he was a Dimera, he was only one by biology. Seeing him today proved that, proved that he could be loving and caring and would do anything to protect her. He loved her more than anyone else and that is why he lied, he wanted to protect her from the family she feared.

"I can't blame you for lying, I of all people am no judge. But, if you would have told me from the beginning I never would have gotten to know you, or fall in love with you and that I understand. You had the best of intensions and I should have seen that, you never thought they would backfire." She said and put her forehead to the television screen, crying louder then ever.


	15. Painted On My Heart Cult

"Painted On My Heart" - Cult

Chapter 14

**I THOUGHT YOU'D BE OUT OF MY MIND**

**AND I'D FINALLY FOUND A WAY TO LEARN TO LIVE WITHOUT YOU**

**I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST A MATTER OF TIME**

TILL I HAD A HUNDRED REASONS NOT TO THINK ABOUT YOU 

As Bart came into the room Sami was still on the floor crying as she looked at the black screen. She couldn't believe that the man she loved was still there, still loving and gentle when it came to her. He was so in love with her and not even her "death" could change that.

"Told you he still loves you." He said and handed her a tray with her breakfast.

**BUT ITS JUST NOT SO**

**AND AFTER ALL THIS TIME, I STILL CAN'T LET GO**

"Ya, I just don't understand how he could be so loving and caring one minute and then a cold hearted monster the next. It just doesn't make sense."

"Oh that's easy, he's always like that. All anyone has to do is say your name and he'll stop dead in his tracks. It's like he's under a trance and it takes him a minute to remember what he was doing. He even calms down to a point. But it fades and he's back to being the man his father wants to see, cold and unforgiving.

**I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**SCRAWLED UPON MY SOUL**

**ETCHED UPON MY MEMORY, BABY**

"I guess that doesn't surprise me really. I mean, I did always shock him and get him to stop dead in his tracks." She said with a laugh, the first in months. But in that moment, Sami finally seen what she was fighting for, a chance to have the life she always wanted with the man she always dreamed of. A life with Ej!

Sami tried her best over the next couple of months to find out all she could able the room and tried to remember all her mother told her about it. She needed to find a way to escape if there was any hope at a real life. After a year of being presumed dead, her faith she would be rescued started to fade, even though Bart did his best to remind Sami of the love she shared with Ej, somehow it just didn't seem like enough any more.

**I'T GOT YOUR KISS**

**STILL BURNING ON MY LIPS**

**THE TOUCH OF MY FINGERTIPS**

**THIS LOVE SO DEEP INSIDE OF ME, BABY**

Ej was more withdrawn then ever from the world, only wearing black to show how he felt about life and not allowing anyone near him since his last attempt at a girlfriend faltered when he couldn't stop thinking of Sami. On the day of Sami's one-year anniversary, the anniversary of her death he went to her grave and brought a different arrangement of flowers, the same ones he gave her on their first date.

**I'VE TRIED EVERYTHING THAT I CAN**

**TO GET MY HEART TO FORGET YOU**

**BUT IT JUST CAN'T SEEM TO**

"Darling, I know this isn't our normal time, or my normal day to visit but today is special. You didn't just die on this day, but a piece of me died too, for we were always connected and therefore my pain is your pain." He said and set the flowers next to the others, as usual her talked for nearly an hour before he could pull himself away from her. He didn't know how to say goodbye.

**I GUESS ITS JUST NO USE**

**IN EVERY PART OF ME**

**IS STILL A PART OF YOU**

"You still have my heart, branded for eternity with your name and no amount of time will change that." As the tears started to fall, he forced himself away, knowing it was only going to get worse as he realized she was gone. Sami's heart broke as she watched him on the screen, her heart breaking wit his as she forced herself to turn off the television and cry in peace. She should have known the tears would be there, every time she seen him that upset she cried, she could feel her heart breaking.

**AND I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**SCRAWLED UPON MY SOUL**

**ETCHED UPON MY MEMORY, BABY**

"What do you got for me today Bart?" She said as she heard the lock on the door, but she was surprised to see Stephano. She hadn't come face to face with him since her wedding day. "Leave me alone." She said and picked up her sweatshirt from the floor and placed it on the edge of the bed. Wanting to do anything but look at him, talk to the man who ruined not only her family's lives but his own son.

**I'VE GOT YOUR KISS**

**STILL BURNIGN ON MY LIPS**

**THE TOUCH OF HER FINGERTIPS**

**THIS LOVE SO DEEP INSIDE OF ME, BABY**

"Samantha, are they not taking care of you?"

"Bart has been doing his job just fine. Sorry if I don't look like a beauty queen when I'm locked in a cell watching you turn your son into a chess piece." She said and could feel the hatred she had for him rise. She was no longer afraid, no longer afraid of what he would do to her.

"I see you've been paying attention. But brains are not going to get you out of here or get me to stop my influence on my son. You will remain here and he will remain on my chessboard, carrying out all my endeavors and not asking questions as to why." He said and walked towards her but she didn't' quiver, or start to walk away from him. She stepped to him.

"I am not afraid anymore. The worst you can do is kill me, and if you do that, really succeed in that you better pray to god Ej never finds out. Because we both know there will be no controlling him then, there will be no stopping him from going after you! He loves me more than anything, all you have to do is look at him and you can see that!" She said and went to turn away but he grabbed her.

"Bart, where is my father?" Ej said as he came crashing through the door, always composing himself and wiping away all tears before entering. Bart just looked at him and knew what needed to be done.

"Basement, I'll show you but you have to stay calm and listen to reason." He said and led Ej straight to her. As Ej entered the room, Stephano had Sami by the throat against the wall and was in the process of strangling her. Ej was frozen in the moment, unsure what he was seeing and what was real. Then he heard her voice, begging for help and he knew he needed to react.

"Ej." Was all she could get out before she started to see the world go black, she was loosing all her focus.

**I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART, BABY**

Ej attacked his father and got him off Sami as she fell to the floor clutching at her throat. Bart went to Sami to check on her while Ej continued to choke his father, however when Sami seen what was happening she scrambled to her feet to grab him.

"Ej no, please let him go. For me, let him go." She said and touched his arm and he immediately loosened his grip and as she spoke started to let go. "Come back to me." Was all she had to say before he let go of Stephano and put her face in his hands.

**SOMETHING IN YOUR EYES KEEPS HAUNTING ME**

**I'M TRYING TO ESCAPE YOU**

**AND I KNOW THERE AINT NO WAY TO**

**TO CHASE YOU FROM MY MIND**

"Darling, are you ok? What happened to you? How long have you been here.?" He asked, hugging her and feeling whole for the first time in years. However, when he went in to kiss her all he got was a slap across the face.

"I've been here for a year! Since the day I supposedly died and not once did you even come close to finding me. If it wasn't for Bart I would have lost my mind months ago, but that doesn't matter. I need to get the hell out of here. Someone please take me away." She said and EJ was the first to stand up and put his arms around her as he headed towards the door. Only pausing to turn around and address his father.

**I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**SCRAWLED UPON MY SOUL**

**ETCHED UPON MY MEMORY BABY**

"Don't even think about going anywhere, me and you have a lot of catching up to do." He said and let Bart out before closing the door behind him, causing his father to be locked in the room, again. When Ej was in the hall with Sami he couldn't help but hug her and pull her close.

**I'VE GOT YOUR KISS**

**STILL BURNING ON MY LIPS**

**THE TOUCH OF MY FINGERTIPS**

**THIS LOVE SO DEEP INSIDE OF ME, BABY**

"You came back to me." Was all he could muster before she finally let him kiss her, knowing that it was the best way to say everything she ever thought she needed to. However, Bart broke it up with his stuttering.

"Uh…I know this isn't…the best time. But uh…"

"Nothing is going to happen to you Bart. Right Ej?" Sami said and hugged Bart, knowing that without him she would really have lost her mind.

"Of course, but you will tell me everything later. Make sure my father gets whatever he needs until I get back. Put Dr. Rolf in there with him just in case. I'll be back." He said and walked out of the mansion and put Sami in his car. However, when they got in the car Ej had yet to say anything, say that he loved her or missed her and for some reason Sami felt like she needed that reassurance.

"Ej what's wrong?" She finally asked, not understanding his silence, he was never quiet. "Are you not happy you found me?"

"There aren't words for me finding you. Darling, I have missed you more than you can even imagine. This last year has been like living without a piece of my heart and I never want to go through that again. You didn't just die in that crash to me, I died with you and I have never been whole since. Not until now." He said and touched her face, giving her the reassurance that he needed.

**I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**I'VE STILL GOT YOUR FACE**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

**PAINTED ON MY HEART**

"Ej, you don't know the whole story, you don't know what really happened.." she started to explain, seeing the guilt still in his eyes, but he stopped her.

"Please not right now. Just let me live in this moment, live in the moment that I have you back. You can tell me everything later, for now I need to take you back to your family, to the Pub." He said and headed there, his hand never leaving hers.


	16. Obligation and Love

**A/N**: No song for this chapter, just couldn't seem to find one that fit.

Chapter 15 

When Ej opened the door to the pub, Caroline was immediately heading over to him, even though she knew that he loved Sami, she still was angry at what he did.

"I know that I am not your favorite person, but I just need you to give me a minute. I have something for you." He said as Sami came in the Pub from behind him, still wearing his jacket.

"Samantha." She said and ran to her granddaughter, Ej knew they needed a minute and headed to grab a drink from the bar. "Oh my, what happened? Where have you been? Are you ok? Does your parents know?"

"Gram slow down, I am alright and no one knows. Ej brought me here first, I was hoping you could call the family and tell them to come here. I didn't want to scare them by calling them." She said and looked over at Ej, who knew to pour her a drink. As he brought over her beer and lemonade the two sat down at a booth while Caroline ran to the phone.

"I can't believe I'm free. Bart really kept his word, he promised he'd let me out." She said and curled up against him, leaning on his shoulder and wishing for things to never change. But he still didn't want to talk about what happened. "But we'll talk about that later." She said, sensing how uncomfortable he felt talking about it, she could see it on his face. As the family piled in, only Belle understood why she was with Ej. She always knew how her sister felt, long before she got a chance to share that with the rest of the family.

"I knew you never gave up." Bell said and hugged Ej, along with her sister. She was also the only one that knew he was the one that left fresh flowers on her grave every Sunday. Always going to see the woman he thought he lost. When the entire family came, it was time for her to explain where she was, but she left out all the details, not ready to explain to her family all that happened. Simply saying, Stephano kidnapped her to keep her from Ej, Bart knew it was getting out of hand so led Ej to her and he brought her to the pub. Ej stayed at the bar while she talked, feeling she needed this time with his family.

"Sami, Stephano kidnapped you? Where were you?" Roman asked, knowing his daughter was holding things back.

"The mansion, in the room Mom was kept in when Kristen was with John." She said and looked down at her cup of coffee. Ej knew that it was because of him, all her pain was because of him and she could see it in his eyes when she looked at him. "This isn't your fault. You weren't even in the country when they kidnapped me." She said and walked over to Ej, the family could see the guilt he felt and knew that it was genuine. "Ej, your father took me because he wanted us apart, not because of anything else. I watched you for a year tear yourself apart, blaming yourself for something you had nothing to do with. Every week you went to my grave, not once missing a Sunday to bring me flowers, always just talking to me." She said and put a hand to his cheek.

"How did you know? The only one that knew was Belle."

"Bart, he knew. He was the one that always made sure the flowers were ready, he used the live feed your father set up to torture me, with you. Showing me you weren't lost completely and you still loved me." She looked into his eyes, but still could see the guilt of everything that happened to her.

"I'm sorry Samantha. I should have known, I should have known you weren't dead and what my father did. I should have found you sooner." He said and she just cut him off before he could say another word.

"You found me now! You went against your father, you went against your family for me and that means more than anything." She said and her family just watched, in shock of how Sami could really tame a Dimera, but John just smiled. He knew all too well what the Dimera's were like and knew it was love that brought you back to reality, to the real word and Ej had that from Sami. She like her mother for him was his moral compass.

"Bart saved you, I just drove you here."

"We both know that's not true, now there's only one thing left to do." She said and stopped him from speaking with her finger to his lips. "Marry me, meet me at the altar and marry me. No theatrics, no fancy setting, just you and me. The thing we should have done a long time ago, marry me Ej." She said and went to kiss him, but he stopped her, pulled away and looked into her eyes.

"No." He said and ran for it. Needing to get as far away from her and as fast as possible. He left the pub got into his car pulling away as fast as he could. Sami just started to fall to pieces, this wasn't happening, he wasn't leaving her, he couldn't leave her. She grabbed for the bar to save her from falling. But it was no use, she slid down to the ground and her mother came over to try and save her from getting hurt.

John looked at Sami and knew he needed to bring Ej back. He kissed Marlena on the cheek and immediately went out the door after Ej, having an idea where he would be. The two needed to have a talk and he needed to know why Ej was so afraid of being with Sami.

"No he can't leave me. He's the reason I fought Stephano to come home, he's the reason I felt like I had something to come home to. He's my life, I can't do this without him, I can't do this alone." She cried and Marlena wanted to cry herself, it wasn't like Sami to feel helpless, but that's exactly what she seen in her daughter's eyes and she knew it hurt.

"Sami you're not alone. You have your family and your son. Ej will come back, he's just worried about you and needs some time to get everything together in his head. It has to be hard knowing him family kidnapped you and kept you captive for a year under his nose, he just needs some time." She said, hoping to reassure her sister that Ej would come back to her, but she wasn't even sure herself.

"No, he's leaving. I know it, that explains why he was so far away in the car, and even when we came here. He was planning on leaving me the whole time. Just looking at me was hard and I knew something was wrong, I just didn't want to face it because I was so happy to be free." She said and looked at Marlena and Belle, wishing things were different.

"What is going on? I know that he is a Dimera, but he loves Sami. We could all see it when he looked at her, so why would he leave?" Hope asked as Marlena walked over, but neither had an answer.


	17. Accept My Sacrifice  Suicidal Tendencie

"Accept My Sacrifice" – Suicidal Tendencies

Chapter 16

John knew he needed to talk to Ej and finally caught up to him at the pier, sitting on a bench, head in his hands and feeling like he was lost. When Ej seen him he wasn't even shocked, he knew someone would come after him and didn't think it would be John. He half expected Samantha, but he was glad it was only John. He couldn't handle Samantha right now, he couldn't see that hurt in her eyes again. Once was enough for a lifetime.

"John what are you doing here?'

"Seems like you are walking out on Sami and I need to know why, I can't sit there and watch her cry if I don't even know why she has to. You love her, we can all see that so why walk away?"

**NO DESTINATION SET**

**I DAZE ALONG TILL SOMETHING FINDS ME**

**WHERE I'VE BEEN I'M NOT SURE**

**I CANNOT SEE THE TEARS, THEY BLIND ME**

"Because her safety comes before my happiness. My family kidnapped her and kept her captive for a year! In my own house, and yet I never once went looking for her. I was serious when I said Bart saved her, the two became somewhat of friends and he decided it was time to let me in on the arrangement with Stephano and Tony."

"Ej do you even know why that room was built?" John asked and Ej just shook his head, knowing that John began to explain. "That room was used to house Marlena when I was with Kristen, me and Marlena were finding our way back to one another and Stephano wanted to stop that and keep me with Kristen, so he built the room to hold Marlena. I lived in that house too and I never once thought she was there, the room isn't even noticeable unless you know where to look. I know the guilt you feel, living with the love of you life and not even knowing it. I have been there and sympathize with you, but that doesn't mean you run away."

"You know what I mean then? I can't just go back to a normal life, things are different now." He said and ran his hand through his hair, looking for an answer he couldn't find.

"Ya, I would give my life for Doc, but I know the best way to protect her is to be with her. I know you hate what your father did and you fear for what he'll do next, but you can't let that fear run your life. It will only turn you into the one thing you despise."

**YOU KNOW THAT SOEMTHING AIN'T RIGHT**

**IT'S A SACRIFICE**

**WHY MUST I PAY THIS PRICE**

**ACCEPT MY SACRIFICE**

"I'm already there, at the wedding, I swore I would never forgive him, but when I finally left Salem after Samantha asked me to, he was right there waiting, then when she was pronounced dead I became his mercenary. I know that I didn't want to, I knew the things I did were wrong but I just didn't care anymore. I had nothing left to loose." He said and looked at John.

"It is hard to put a past like ours behind us, we have both been Stephano's pawn's in a game of chess, but that doesn't mean we had to stay that. I found my way out and found Marlena and that has always kept me from being that man again. Now you just need to make that choice for yourself."

**AN EMPTINESS SO FULL**

**I CAP IT OFF WITH **

**EXPECTATIONS**

**A SIGHT NOT TO BEHOLD**

**I COVER ALL IN EXPLAINATION**

"Sami didn't tell you guys everything that happened. When I found her, Stephano was in the process of choking her, he had her against the wall and I could see the life draining from her eyes, and I just lost it. I don't even know how I did it, but I grabbed him and put the same pressure on him that he had on Samantha. I nearly killed my own father, I was strangling him and all I seen was red. There was no reason in my mind anymore, my only thought was to kill him for all he's done. It took Samantha to bring me back and show me what I was about to do. If she weren't there I would have killed him." He said and John just took it all in. "I almost became a murderer, I was so blinded by anger and hate that I didn't even know what I was doing."

"But you didn't, you came back to reality. It may have taken Sami but you came back. Some times all it takes is the moral compass in our lives to stop us from doing something in the heat of the moment that we know is wrong. Sami is that for you. She saved you as much as you saved her, why give that up?"

"Because I can't put her in that situation again, I can't put her in the situation of being in danger from my family, or pulling me back off a ledge. I'm going to leave and trust you to protect her as I would."

**YOU KNOW THAT SOEMTHING AIN'T RIGHT**

**IT'S A SACRIFICE**

**WHY MUST I PAY THIS PRICE**

**ACCEPT MY SACRIFICE**

"But what happens when she goes looking for you? This all happened I'm assuming when she went to the mansion to find me, Belle told me where she was headed that night and I knew I should have gone with her. But she was so determined to find you, you know she will do it again. She isn't giving you up, you were what she was fighting for, why would she walk away now? But whatever you decide, you owe it to her to tell her to her face."

**IT'S A SACRIFICE**

**NO NO NO NO**

**IT'S A SACRIFCE A SACRIFICE**

"I can't, if I go back I don't think I can leave again. It took everything I had to leave tonight, to walk away from her. I have to do this for her, I have to leave to make sure she always has the protection she needs. Sometimes what you want and what you need are two very different things." He said and took a few steps away. "But I do need a favor, just make sure she is ok, that she has everything she ever needs and I will give her anything, just call me and she will have it." He said and gave John his number before walking away. Knowing he had the hardest day ahead of him with leaving her again.

When John came back to the pub, Sami ran to him seeing on his face that he was with Ej. She knew he would have an answer, would know where he was.

"Where is he? Is he ok? He's coming back right? Please, tell me he's coming back." She said and used him to keep her upright as she continued to cry.

"Sami Gene, he's alright physically, but he just needs sometime. We both know more happened then what you led on and that is something that he needs to deal with. But he loves you, he will always love you that is the only thing he is sure of."

"You didn't answer my question, is he coming back?" She asked again, looking at him with puppy dog eyes that melted his heart. He wanted to lie, to tell her Ej would come back but he wasn't sure.

"I don't know." He said and Sami started to fall again, her world was crashing around her and this time she had nothing to protect her. John told Belle to take Sami back to the loft, that he would call and check on them later.

"That's right, I don't even have a home." She said and headed out with her sister, feeling like Ej did when she died, as if she had nothing left to loose.

When they left, he, Marlena, Bo and Hope all sat down at a table to talk. John just looked at the three faces and didn't know how to start, everything Ej said made complete sense, but it would never make since to Sami and he knew that.

"What he say?" Hope asked, not being able to wait for John to start.

"He needs to leave to protect her, he just can't face her and tell her. If he comes back I really don't think he'll have the strength to leave again. He is a mess, he just can't seem to forget what almost happened today."

**SAILING OFF OF COURSE, DIRECTIONS LOST**

**THERE IS NO EXIT**

**THE CAPTAIN ABANDONED SHIP, NOW MUTINY**

**HOW COULD I SUSPECT THIS**

"What are you talking about?" Bo asked, confused at the look on John's face.

"Ej almost killed his father, he nearly strangled Stephano when he rescued Sami."

"What?" Marlena asked, shocked at the news and worried about how it would affect her daughter.

"Apparently when Ej found Sami, Stephano was strangling her and he snapped. He grabbed him and seen red, it took Sami to stop him and that scares him. He's scared at how easy it was for him to loose it, he just wants to protect Sami. Leaving is the only way he thinks there is to do that, he's afraid if he stays his father will try again and this time finish the job."

"That's a lot to handle, not only does your family kidnap the women you love and fake her death, but then goes to kill her after a year. I could see where he needs some time, but is he really going to leave her? I mean, Sami loves him more then anything, it will destroy her." Hope said and looked around at the table.

"That's what I said, but he says it has to be this way, and hopes we'll be there to protect her but call him if she needs anything. He's willing to sacrifice his own happiness to protect her, I just told him he needs to tell Sami, he needs to be the one to break her heart if he's really going to leave." John said and everyone shook their heads in agreement.

**IT'S A SACRIFICE, IT'S A SACRIFICE, ACCEPT MY SACRIFICE**

**IT'S A SACRIFICE, IT'S A SACRIFICE, IT'S A SACRIFICE**

**ACCEPT MY SACRIFICE**


	18. Crash and Burn

A/N: No song for this chapter

Chapter 17

Belle took Sami back to the loft, and called Phillip along the way to make sure he wasn't there. The last thing Sami needed was to see her sister in a sham of a marriage when she warned her before her "disappearance" about falling her heart. Sami came into the apartment and Shawn followed them when he caught the two in the hall.

"Sami I'm glad to hear you're alight, my mom just called to tell me." He said and hugged his cousin; even though the two weren't close she didn't deserve what happened to her, no matter what she had done in the past.

"Thank you, it's been a long year. Belle, I think I'm going to go get a shower, why don't you two talk. Belle was just telling me she needed to talk to you." Sami said and tried her best to sneak out of the room without being noticed, or that she took Belle's purse with her. Shawn just looked at Belle, but neither knew what to say, Sami's comment caught them both off guard

As Sami went upstairs, she climbed up the fire escape to the roof and then took the stairs out of the building, heading straight to Belle's car in a hope to runaway from all the pain that was building up within her. She could feel the anguish and just wanted to get away, go to the one place she always felt safe. As she headed out of Salem, she instinctively went to Green Mountain Lodge, remembering what it once meant to her. As she walked into the Honeymoon Suite, the only room left she closed the door and leaned against it as she finally let the tears fall.

"Why Ej? Why did you have to abandon me after everything." She sobbed and sat there leaning against the door, not even having the strength to make it too the bed.

It took nearly an hour to realize that Sami was not in the apartment any longer and Belle became panicked. She seen the window open to the fire escape but Sami was nowhere in sight.

"I have to find her." She said and then noticed what was missing, her purse with her keys and wallet. Sami was running away. As she called John, she knew that things were not looking well for her sister. Sami was in no state to be alone, let alone driving to go knows where.

"We'll find her Izzy, have Shawn drive you over to the Pub and I'll meet you there. Just stay calm." He said and hung up, dialing Ej before anyone else. Ej was just getting ready to walk into the Dimera Mansion when he heard his phone go off and instinctively knew it couldn't be good news.

"Wells," he started but John shocked him with his words and Ej instantly leaned against the wall, trying to grasp what was happening. He just got her back, he just took her home and she was already gone again. He couldn't handle this, he couldn't loose her again.

"Do you have any idea where she would go? You know her better then any of us." John said and Ej knew he was right but he couldn't think. He couldn't imagine why she would run away when she just got home.

"I'll go to a couple of places and look, call me if you hear anything." He said and hung up running back to his car in hopes he could find her before anything happened to his Samantha. It took him about five minutes of driving before he realized where she would go, she wanted to feel safe and there was only one place that still held that for her.

"Damn it Samantha, why do you always have to be so difficult." HE said and headed to Green Mountain Lodge, not at all surprised to see Belle's car, horribly parked in the back. As he walked into the lobby his suspicions were confirmed. "Yes, did a women come in here a little bit ago," he said and held up a picture he still kept in his wallet. As the man nodded he sighed with relief.

"Ej, we're at the pub did you find her?"

"She's at Green Mountain Lodge, I'm heading to her room to check on her now. She used Belle's credit card to get a room." Ej said and John laughed, knowing exactly what Sami was doing. She was making Ej come look for her so she could finally have a conversation without him running out on her. When he knocked on the door he could feel her presence on the other side and his heart ached for her, knowing the one thing he had to do was the one thing breaking her heart in pieces.

"Samantha." He said and pulled her into his arms as she opened the door, not at all surprised to see him there. "You had everyone so worried, if you wanted to come here you should have let someone know. You were supposed to be with Belle." He said and kissed her forehead as a sign of relief. "Why did you run away?"

"To think, to see you." She answered and closed the door before heading over to the bed.

"What do you mean to see me?" He said and as she smiled he figured it out. "You ran away because you knew I would come looking for you. That I would not stop until I seen you were safe with my own eyes."

"I deserved that, I deserved an explanation for why you are so quick to leave me when you love me with everything in you. Your heart, and your soul they have always been mind and nothing can change that. So why leave? Why run away when all you ever wanted to do was marry me?" She said and he walked over to the bed, hitting his knees in front of her and wiping away her tears.

"Because I love you, I love you more then my self and that means your safety comes before everything else." He said and went to get up but she grabbed his hands forcing him to stay.

"You love me, so you're leaving me? I don't understand."

"I can't risk you getting hurt again and we both know my father will never give up on trying to destroy us. He wants me to be his pawn and I will never be that as long as I am with you. As long as I have you showing me there is more to life then his acceptance. I need to keep an eye on him to ensure his plans never, and I mean never include you again."

"No! I'm not giving you up; I fought too hard to come back to you. I don't care if I'm in danger, or if we always have to worry about your father. I will have you." She said and put a hand to his cheek.

"But I care, I will always be at fear for you and for what he might do to you if given the chance. Samantha, please just let me do this. Just let me protect you, I couldn't survive loosing you again it almost killed me. I never want to go back to what I was then, to the shell of a man that I was." He pulled his hands from her embrace and slowly backed away from her. "You need to go back to your family."

"Ej you are my family. You are my home. You are the only thing I have and I can't give that up. Not now, not ever." She said and stood in front of the door. Hoping it would be enough, she could say enough to change the decision she could already see in his eyes.

"Please don't make this any harder. It's hard enough leaving you already. Please." He said, his eyes begging her to stop, but she wasn't building. Just kept standing there, tears streaming down her face shaking her head.

"No! I can't let you go, I don't know how." She paused as she thought about he situation, she needed to buy time. She needed to get him to stay if she was ever going to convince him to never leave. "Give me tonight, after everything I earned that. Just give me tonight and then if you still want to go I won't stand in your way." She said and watched as he loosened his tie, she won. But would she win the war?

"Tonight, I guess there is a lot to say." He said and sat on the bed, but when she sat next to him he didn't want to talk. He just wanted to hold her in his arms and make all the pain go away. Forget all that transpired over the past two years and go back to what they were before, to the happy couple they once were. Before he could get out a word, to say anything she read his thoughts and kissed him, knowing that it was the one thing he would never deny her of. He revealed in that kiss, feeling all the comfort she use to give him, all the love and devotion that they had.

"Samantha, darling, tonight is about talking and if we start that I am not sure I'll ever be able to do anything else then to make love to you." He said pulling away, knowing it was the last thing he needed.

"Ej, I need you. I need to remember what it feels like to be loved, to be touched and to have you looking at me as if I am the only woman in the world. Don't deny me that." She said as she pulled him into another kiss, this one leaving them both lost and unable to think of anything else. There was no denying it, he wanted her, he always wanted her and tonight was no different.

As he took Sami in his arms he remembered what it was like to touch her, how smooth her skin felt against his and how she moaned as he made love to her. It was all he thought about when he believed her to be dead, the reason no other woman would ever be able to take her place, there was just no one who could make him feel the way Sami did. When both were exhausted, and falling back on the bed he instinctively pulled her into his arms, leaving no space between them and giving no room for escape. If this was the memory he would have to carry with him during their time apart he wanted it all to sink in. The way her hair smelled of jasmine, or how she left a scratch on his back by his right shoulder blade and even the was she whispered I love you.

"Ej, remember after the wedding, when I refused to talk to you. It was never about you name, or the fact I have spent all of my life fearing your family. I didn't care about what my family thought knowing I was in love with a Dimera. That was never it, it was the lie." She said and Ej wrapped his arms around her even tighter, knowing it was coming, knowing she would never just let him hold her in silence.

"Samantha,"

"Please let me finish, I hated that you sat there and listened to everything that I said. You listened to me tell you what your father did to me and my family and never said anything. You just went along as if you never met them before, that's what hurt. Sitting there day in and day out telling you all of my problems when you didn't trust me enough to tell me any of yours. You knew everything, all my darkest secrets yet you told me none of yours." She said and rolled her over to look at him, needing to look in her eyes as he said this.

"Samantha it was never that I didn't trust you. It was never that. It was that I knew you feared my family, I knew what they did to you and I knew you would never get past my name until you met me, until you felt like you could trust me. I always meant to tell you, I truly did. Just after the wedding, after you became my wife. Call me crazy but I figured you would be able to forgive your husband easier then your best friend, or the man you were dating. I must have tried a million times, but I always seen how things would end and how you would leave because of the family I came from." He said and ran his fingers down her cheek, amazed at how natural everything still felt. She didn't feel foreign to him, but as if he could outline her body with out ever looking at her. He knew her that well. As she kissed him she could feel it all over again, the passion they felt for one another was there, that was the one thing neither could deny.

As Sami pulled away and looked up at him, the pain in her eyes started to fade, leaving something else behind, fear. Over and over he kept begging her to stay quiet, not to say anything that would ruin the memory he was to take with him. The memory of holding her in his arms knowing it was the last time he would ever feel complete.

If all I have is tonight then you're going to listen to me. I need to talk about what happened and I need to talk about it with you." She said and he could feel the memory becoming strained, see how with few words it could be tainted into something more painful then he could ever imagine.

"Please, please just let me hold you. Just let me have this. Let this be the memory I take with me when I leave." He said, running his fingers through her hair and trying to keep his heart from racing as he touched her.

"Then stay, you want this then stay! We can always have this we can have this every night, go to sleep with me in your arms and wake up knowing I'm still there. Have the future we always wanted, buying a house and having kids. Raising the family you and I never had." She said and could feel her affects on him, seeing how her words were bringing him to the brink of tears.

"I already told you I can't, no matter what how much I wish we could have that. I want you, I always want you, when I go to sleep and when I wake up. I want you in my arms and I want to see the smile you have when I tell you I love you and that I always will. I want to see how your eyes light up when I bring you flowers on my way home from the office. I want you to crawl in my lap and tell me all your troubles thinking I could ever be mad. When truth is your story telling amazes me as you try to make it all sound better."

"That's what I missed the most. You telling me everything would be ok when my world was falling apart before my eyes. Do you know that's when I fell in love with you? When you let me lay with my head in your lap and soothed away all my tears and fears about what I brought my life to."

"You mean after your non wedding to Austin?"

"Ya, I had never had someone in my life do that for me. Give me that security and love without wanting anything in return. That wasn't the only thing I realized that day. I finally saw that you were in love with me, not falling in love but really in love. There was something different about the way you looked at me."

"That's because I realized I could have you, when you kissed me that morning, even though I knew you thought I was Austin. I hoped you knew it was me, and that you seen there was always something there. But I feel in love with you long before that. Remember the photo shoot? When you flipped out on that model and fired her, leaving only you to take her place. I lost it, I wanted nothing more then to grab you in my arms right then and there but I knew it wasn't my place and I couldn't be the one to deny you Austin. That was your dream and I refused to take that from you, no matter how much I loved you. So I hung back and waited, hoping you would see what I already seen. But I wanted you from the moment I met you."

"I know, there was always something deeper with us, something beyond the surface we couldn't deny. Plus, I got to see you in all your glory that day." She said and both started laughing, remembering their initial meeting, Ej wrapped in a towel and Sami dripping from head to toe. As the two continued to stroll down memory lane, Ej ordered something, knowing Sami had to eat and he was hungry himself.

"Remember our anniversary? A year after we started dating…" he cut her off, knowing where it was going, reading her thoughts was one of his favorite games and she knew it.

"I brought you here after dinner, this same room and proposed to you on the balcony. We holed up here for the weekend. You told me it was the one place outside of my arms that you felt safe. Where you felt calm and protected as if no one could hurt you, where you could think and not worry about who heard your thoughts. Its why I came here, knowing that was what you were seeking once again."

"You're right, that's exactly why I came here. But we're not done talking. You need to understand what I went through in that room, please just let me explain and maybe you'll decide to stay with me. See I really wasn't in that much danger."

"I walked in on my father trying to strangle you, that's danger sweetheart." He said, hating how his words rang truth to something her heart just couldn't grasp.

"Ej that was my fault, I was starting to loose hope and had no fear from Stephano, that was the first day he ever came to see me. Always sending Bart to take care of me. We started arguing and I told him that you would never forgive him for what he did, that if he ever wanted to see you become a Dimera, then tell you I was dead and it was done by his own hands. I knew you would never betray what we had, that you would always look to me to save you from the ideas your father put in your head. That you would never be his pawn no matter how much he tried." He went to interrupt but she silenced him with her lips. "I wasn't afraid anymore, even before I saw you I wasn't afraid. I knew you would never let him kill me, you would walk to hell and back to save me."

"Still doesn't excuse what he did."

"Ya, nothing does but please don't give him that satisfaction. Don't give him the satisfaction that he got the better of us, that he broke us up and caused us both to forever live in misery. Why after all he's done give him that?" she said, but he never got to answer, just pulled away from her grasp as he went to answer the door, pulling in the room service tray.


	19. When You're Gone Avril Lavigne

"When You're Gone" – Avril Lavigne

Chapter 18 

When he turned around she was nowhere in sight, standing on the balcony still wrapped in the sheet from the bed, and could feel his presence as he came up behind her. "You never answered me."

"Because I don't have an answer. As much as I want to I can't fix this the way you want darling, I can't erase who my family is no matter how much I want to. I just know it's what I have to do. Its blind faith darling, faith that as I walk away I will have the satisfaction of knowing you're safe." He said and tried to guide her back inside.

She could feel how this hurt him, see the pain in his eyes knowing the words were cutting him inside, causing the actual leaving to be so much worse then anything she was currently feeling. She couldn't help but feel like it wasn't fair. There shouldn't be anything ripping them apart.

**I always needed time on my own  
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry  
And the days feel like years when I'm alone  
And the bed where you lie  
is made up on your side**

"Just give me a minute." She said, and as he left she whispered to the wind. "Destiny can only be fought for so long, you can only run so far before it catches up with you and our destiny was always and will always lie with one another."

As she reentered the room Ej had dinner all set up on the table and pulled her chair out for her as he poured them both a glass of wine. The two ate in silence, no words were left to be spoken and there was nothing either could do to fix what was broken. Ej would never stay knowing it could hurt Sami and she could never imagine a life without him. It brought back feelings to her last mean in prison all over again, she could feel her life slipping away, knowing the second he walked out the door her life was over.

"Ej," she finally said, putting her fork down and staring at him from across the table. "Please just hold me, just hold me and tell me everything is going to be ok." She said and before she could get up he was already at her side and carrying her into bed, pulling the covers up over both of them as they lay in one another's arms trying to find the solace that would give them the strength they both would need when the sun came up.

As Ej woke at 7, he never expected to find her gone, to find half of the bed empty and be panicked with uncertainty. He jumped up and started looking around, panic showing on his face and fear in his eyes, where was she? Why did she leave? A million questions were running through his head as he made his way to the balcony, seeing her standing there, leaning on the rail and surely crying. His heart returned to normal at the sight of her, but it still ached for the pain he seen in her tears.

**When you walk away  
I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now?**

"It's freezing out here, why are you standing in the cold?"

"Trying to imagine a life without you, a life where I will forever be alone. Waking up and…" the tears continued to fall, causing her breathing to quicken and be uneasy. "but knowing I'll never have that security again kills me. It's like being in that room all over again, knowing you want me and knowing you need me but me powerless to do anything about it."

He went to touch her, to wipe away her tears and pull her into his embrace, but it was only air he reached as she pulled away.

"No, you don't get to be the hero, you don't get to leave me and be the one to hold me at the same time. It doesn't work like that. You made your choice, I can see it in your eyes. So GO!" She yelled and used the railing to brace her from falling as he crying became too much. "Just do me one thing," she said and he looked her right in the eyes as she spoke, knowing her demand would not be easy.

"Anything, just as long as its not asking me to stay." He said and knew a million questions could be in her head, He feared of what she would asked and hoped it was something he could not refuse, hoped that it was something he could give her to make this easier. Her tears were weighting on him, making this more difficult then accepting her death and venturing to her funeral. Harder then all his trips to her grave. It was one thing to say goodbye to a memory, but another to the woman begging you to stay.

When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone 

"Tell me you don't love me. Tell me there's someone else and that you don't want me anymore. Tell me your heart loves someone else and it was never really mine." She cried and continued to walk away before almost falling. He went to catch her but she stopped him. "No, if you need to leave then leave. But leave knowing there's no turning back. You walk away today you walk away forever, no coming back in a week or a year begging me to forgive you and take you back." She said and her eyes held a confidence her heart didn't know.

All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day  
And make it OK  
I miss you

"I can't, I can't tell you I don't love you when I do. I also can't stay and I know that hurts because I feel the pain too. I feel it as I look in your eyes and see the tears fall. I see it as I look in the mirror and know I am going back to a shell of a man because I will never be able to love anyone else. But even with all that, I have hope that in doing this I will protect you from a life you should never have to live. As much as I want you now is not the time to be selfish."

**I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do  
Reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left  
they lie on my floor  
And they smell just like you  
I love the things that you do**

"Then leave, don't stay here and drag this out. The sooner you leave the sooner I'll be able to put you behind me. To walk away from the only true love I ever had and use all the strength I can gather to live again. Just please don't come back, don't try and walk back into my life and don't try to be my friend. Ej, it really is going to take everything I have to move on from you, from us so please don't come back and crush all the I have built." She said and finally let herself fall.

**When you walk away  
I count the steps that you take**

**Do you see how much I need you right now?**

"I wish things were different." Was all he said as he walked into the room and started to get dressed. She counted his steps as he went around the room collecting the pieces of his suit. One…over to the chair for his pants and belt, two…to retrieve his shirt from by the fire place, three…shoes and tie by the door. Then four, pausing as he turned around to look at her one last time before he left, not uttering a word, but trying to hold his tears at bay. She ran to the door and felt him on the other side.

**When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
And when you're gone  
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day  
And make it OK  
I miss you**

**We were made for each other  
Out here forever  
I know we were  
Yeah Yeah**

As she slid down the door she realized what he left behind. Next to the bed layed his watch, the one she gave him on the eve of their wedding. The one she had especially inscribed for the two of them. She couldn't' bare to look at it, knowing the inscription would rip her inside out.

_Love is always there to catch you when you fall!_

**All I ever wanted was for you to know  
Everything I do I give my heart and soul  
I can hardly breathe, I need to feel you here with me  
Yeah**

When Sami died on the floor, Ej went to speak the manager, trying his best to take care of her despite him leaving her.

"Samantha Brady, the women in the honeymoon suite, she can have anything she wants. Make sure she is taken care of and can stay as long or as many times as she wants. Call me and I'll take care of any charges, just never tell her who is picking up the bill." He said and slipped out and to the parking lot, staring up at her room, knowing she was still crying because he was too.

"If only I knew you'd be ok." Was all he could say as he got in his car and left, needing to make arrangements before he truly could leave her.

**When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day  
And make it OK  
I miss you**


End file.
